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Band 4.5

In the past, the role of a teacher was to provide information. Today, students have access to a lot of information. There is, therefore, no role for teacher in modern education. Do you agree or disagree?

#role #teacher #information #students #access #education
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Teachers are the second God to many children. It is undoubtedly true that many platforms are now available for students to gain information and replaced the role of a teacher to a certain extent.
However
Linking Words
, it is not completely possible as no machine can mould a child as a good teacher does. Apart from parents, tutors would know the mental and emotional stability of a child during the course of their study as they spend the majority of their
time
Use synonyms
 in school.
Firstly
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, the physical appearance of a mentor in a classroom helps the kids to solve any complex queries
while
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 studying and can provide various strategies to overcome them.
This
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 can lead to a good rapport among them.
Moreover
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, they can mould a child by upbringing their emotional and psychological skills making the parents less worried.
Also
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, teachers ensure that each student in the class gets an equal amount of attention
by
Change preposition
in
show examples
customised
Correct article usage
a customised
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 learning approach.
Although
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,
Remove the comma
apply
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 vast information is available
in
Change preposition
on
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 the internet to guide the freshman, they won't be able to judge the correct approach with their own ability which in turn misleads their future. Online classes may stress the
kids
Change to a genitive case
kid's
kids'
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 health as they spend a lot of
time
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infront
Correct your spelling
in front
 of the laptop or computer screen. Studies
shows
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show
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 that many kids were admitted
in
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to
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 the hospital with migraine and headache
due to
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 an increase in screen
time
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 ,especially during
COVID 19
Add a hyphen
COVID-19
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.
Further
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, extensive use of technology has spoiled the performance of the student as it consumes their
time
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 surfing media, playing video games etc. I would argue that teachers are really important in modern education as they help the younger generation to go
in
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on
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 the right path, both in their personal and school life. Right guidance at the right
time
Use synonyms
 is equally important and it requires a human touch which machines cannot provide.
Submitted by jerrinmjo on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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