IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Car ownership has increased so rapidly over the past thirty years that many cities in the world are now 'one big traffic jam'. How true do you think this statement is? What measures can governments take to discourage people from using their cars?

#car #ownership #thirty #years #cities #world #traffic #jam #measures #governments #people #cars
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In the
last
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 few years,
traffic
Use synonyms
 congestion increased really fast within big towns
due to
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 the rise of car popularity. I believe that
this
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 statement is true and
this
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 essay will give evidence of my belief and will
also
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 propose some ideas to cope with
this
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 issue. In recent times, the need
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 independence pushed more and more people to buy their own
car
Fix the agreement mistake
cars
show examples
. In fact, a current survey conducted by the University of Milan shows that in 2023 in Italy one person out of 3 owns their own vehicle and
consequently
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traffic
Use synonyms
 grew. Regardless
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the statistics, the growth of
cars
Add a comma
,cars
show examples
 number is a phenomenon that we can witness in our daily life just by taking a walk in a big city. As regards my personal experience, I can firmly state that lately moving within my town, Turin, has never been
taugher
Correct your spelling
tougher
taught
. Once going to the
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
 used to take 10 minutes by walking from my house.
Instead
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, now it requires at least 20 minutes more thanks to the intense
traffic
Use synonyms
 that obligates you to wait a lot of time before you can cross the street.
Moreover
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,
roads
Change the noun form
road
show examples
 congestion has plenty of other dangerous consequences
such
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 as air pollution and it
also
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 increases the risk of accidents. The terrible drawbacks I previously mentioned represent a huge problem that should be addressed by politicians. There are tons of ways in which governments could try to face
this
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 trouble.
For instance
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, they could introduce a speed limit in certain urban areas so that people are discouraged to drive close to the town
center
Change the spelling
centre
show examples
. Plus, in
this
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 way
traffic
Use synonyms
 is more controlled.
Furthermore
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, in order to reduce the usage of cars, public means of transport
such
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 as the bus and the metro should be improved.
To sum up
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, it is undeniable that
cties
Correct your spelling
city
 congestion is rising.
This
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 affair regards every single citizen who drives a vehicle,
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however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 I think that State authorities have the duty to deal with it by implementing laws in order to prevent
this
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 unpleasant situation.
Submitted by aliceterreno on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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