If we want to save the future of the planet, we will have to dramatically change our way of life. What is your opinion?

Nowadays, our

planet

needs our help. So, we must change our lifestyle. In

this

essay, I will explain how we change our lifestyle. Let's commence by looking at the first course and its solution. I think it is factories and personal car's polluted

air

Hence

this

polluted

air

is too harmful to our

planet

and the atmosphere. If we

will

Verb problem

show examples

not prevent it on time our earth can die, and polluted

air

lead

Correct subject-verb agreement

leads

show examples

to the earthʼs Azan layer breaking. Its solution is we must restrict our personal cars and

factoryʼs'

Change noun form

factoryʼs

show examples

numbers. It can lead to helping our earth.

This

method is very effective.

Hence

, our world-developed countries use

this

method, and their natural resource and the

air

is like a new, and too fresh Let's start by looking at the second reason and its solution. I think it is we must restrict visits to other planets and we must protect our natural resources.

Hence

, our natural wealth organises for our

planet

. If we protect our natural wealth, our

planet

will never die. Nowadays plenty of developed countries

uses

Correct subject-verb agreement

use

show examples

rackets and space ship for going for research from space. These rackets and space

areships

Correct your spelling

airships

ships

useful

Add a missing verb

are useful

show examples

for people.

However

, those things are harmful to our

planet

. Nowadays our

planet

needs

peopleʼs

Change noun form

people's

show examples

help.

To sum up

, if we would love to protect our

planet

, we must restrict personal cars and factoryʼs numbers.

Although

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

demands that things, our earth will not die. In my view, now we live in

this

place and we are responsible for our

planet

Submitted by abrorjon_1995 on Mon Mar 27 2023

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coherence cohesion

It is essential to include an introduction and conclusion in the essay to provide a clear framework for the discussion and to summarize the main points.

task response

The essay addresses the task prompt but lacks detail and development in the discussion. It would benefit from providing more specific examples and elaborating on the ideas further.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

255 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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If we want to save the future of the planet, we will have to dramatically change our way of life. What is your opinion?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

some people said professionals such as doctors or engineers should be required to work in the country where they did their training while other said they should be free to work in another country

Some educationalist think that international exchange visit will benefit teenagers at the school. To what extent do advantages outweight the disadvantages.

In recent years some countries have experienced vary rapid economic development. This has resulted in much higher standards of living in urban areas but not in the country sides. This situation may bring some problems for the country as a whole. What are the problems? How might they be reduced?