Today children and adults from many countries play video games. Some people believe playing video games is harmful. To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

#children #adults #countries #video #games #people

With the advancement of technology, there are multifarious kinds of online

games

launched in the market and today's generation is totally addicted to those

games

. One group of people claim that playing video

games

is not beneficial for infants. I fully agree with the given statement and I will elaborate on my viewpoints with suitable examples and a conclusion in subsequent paragraphs. To strengthen my point of view, computerized

games

can put negative effects on offspring health.

Firstly

, if they will spend their most of time on online

games

by sitting at one location for long hours

then

children

can confront obesity, back pain and heart problems disorders owing to

this

, they will begin taking medicines at an earlier age and they will not remain strong for their future life.

Secondly

, eye strain is the biggest problem which occurs because of online

games

when infants get addicted to video

games

and they do not go outside for outdoor activities

due to

this

, the offspring get headaches or poor concentration

therefore

, they get poor vision and get eyeglasses, lenses from their childhood age and sometimes it becomes the biggest problem for them.

Furthermore

, some online

games

increase crime in cities because of that,

children

are entitled to bad companies and they adopt bad habits dint of

this

, infants try to mimic those scenes and they do big crimes

as a result

, they get in jail and they spoil their whole life. To cite an example, the Manhunt game is banned in India because it was helping to raise crime among the

children

that are why, the government banned it for the best future of the kids.

Moreover

children

do not get an opportunity to learn interpersonal skills

such

as sympathy, teamwork and time management because they do not play

games

in pairs ,

therefore

, they become arrogant

instead

of good people. To recapitulate, parents must keep an eye on their kids when they play online

games

and they

also

give them minimum time for video

games

. Parents and teachers should encourage the kids to get involved in outside activities.

Submitted by sekhogghk on Wed Apr 05 2023

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

347 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today children and adults from many countries play video games. Some people believe playing video games is harmful. To what extent do you agree with this opinion?

Fully explain your ideas

Films and games can be accessed at any time from mobile devices like smart phones, tablets and laptop computer. Do the advantages of such development outweigh the disadvantage? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Computers are becoming an essential part of school lessons. Do the advantages of using computers for learning outweigh its disadvantages?

Some people think that mobile phones should be banned in public places like libraries, shops and on public transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

In most countries, young people form a large proportion of those who are unemployed. Why this is the case, and what can be done to solve the problem?

The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.