IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

It is important for children to learn the difference between right nad wrong at n early age. Punishment is necessary to help them learn this distinction. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? What sort of punishment should be parents and teachers be allowed to use to teach good behaviour to children? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from you own knowledge or experience.

#children #difference #right #nad #n #age #punishment #distinction #sort #parents #teachers #behaviour
Children
 need to be guided and taught about right and wrong from an early age as it is the best time to build character. Some people argue that sometimes
punishment
 is needed to help them to understand about mistakes they conducted. I Agree with
this
 statement as long as the
punishment
 given is educative and no hitting is involved. I will elaborate
further
about
Change preposition
on
show examples
 negative rewards that can be given to offspring in order to educate them.
To begin
 with,
children
 were born without any knowledge about
this
 life.
Therefore
, it is the responsibility of their parents to teach them how to behave well in society, and sometimes educative
punishment
 is needed when they commit bad acts. I believe that parents should carefully choose the kind of negative rewards that they will give to their
children
 as it may have appalling effects on their self-esteem and development. there are several methods of
punishment
 that can be allowed for
children
.
Firstly
, responsibility to do household chores on the weekend. I see that many modern
family
Change to a plural noun
families
show examples
 pose
this
 kind of
punishment
 to their
children
 when they do something bad,
such
 as not finishing their
Correct your spelling
homework
show examples
home work
Correct your spelling
homework
show examples
 or fighting with their peers
Submitted by irarahmawati.polkesma on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: