IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

TOPIC: In many countries, smoking is now illegal in public places. Many people believe that such a ban is justified. Do you agree or disagree?

#topic #countries #places #people #ban
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It is commonly argued that the authorities in many nations are justified in imposing a strict ban on smoking in public areas.
This
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 essay totally agrees with that statement because public
places
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 are where most
people
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’s health can be adversely affected and those who
smoke
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 in the company of many others will set a bad example for young generations. The first reason why I consider it imperative that
smokers
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 be fined or punished for their acts in public locations is that puffing a cigarette in those
places
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 can put the majority of
people
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’s health at risk.
This
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 is because public
places
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 are where a huge number of pedestrians, cyclists or office workers prefer to gather, and,
as a result
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, allowing someone to
smoke
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 at their leisure in those
places
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 exposes many others to passive
smoke
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, which in turn leads to more respiratory diseases
such
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 as lung cancer or breathing problems.
That is
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 why almost no restaurants or hotels in Vietnam allow their patrons, visitors and staff to
smoke
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 on their premises, but ,
,
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apply
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instead
Add a comma
,instead
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 they would offer private rooms for
smokers
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 with a view to preventing them from doing harm to other
people
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.
Further
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 support for my agreement with prohibition is that adolescents may model themselves as
smokers
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 in public
places
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. As juveniles at impressionable ages are prone to mimicking what adults can legitimately do
such
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 as drinking or getting tattooed, the image of lighting a cigarette and creating a bubble from it stylishly in front of their awestruck friends can tempt youngsters into trying smoking first and
then
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 becoming compulsive
smokers
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.
Therefore
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, allowing adults to
smoke
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 in parks, shopping malls or game centres often frequented by young
people
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 may lead to a higher proportion of young smoking addicts in the future.
For instance
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, many high school students in Vietnam are reported to secretly take up smoking after seeing their fathers or other family members consume a cigarette in crowded
places
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. In conclusion, I strongly agree that prohibiting
people
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 from smoking in public
places
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 is justifiable because that would protect the public’s health from second-hand
smoke
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 and deter young
people
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 from becoming future
smokers
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.
Submitted by khangtram1203 on

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