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Writing Samples
Band 4

The graph shows the percentage of UK adolescents following a vegetarian diet. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features.

The graph shows the percentage of UK adolescents following a vegetarian diet. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features.
#percentage #uk #adolescents #diet #summarise #information #features
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The graph demonstrates the
percentage
Use synonyms
 of UK adolescents following a vegetarian diet ranging from a period of 60
years
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 starting from 1960. The initial
percentage
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 was 0% corresponding with the year 1960. The
percentage
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 gradually and consistently
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increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
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 as the
years
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 increases by 10 until it reach the highest
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
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 in 1980.
This
Linking Words
 means that within 20
years
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, the
percentage
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 had
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increase
Change the verb form
increased
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 from 0% to 15%. In the year 1980, the
percentage
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 of adolescents following a vegetable diet reaches 15%. After that, there is a gradual decrease in
percentage
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 from 1980 to 1990 starting from 15% and down to an
estimate
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estimated
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of
Change preposition
apply
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5% to 6%. In 10
years
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 between 1990 and 2000, many changes are shown in the
percentage
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.
This
Linking Words
 is where many outliers take place in the chart, there
are
Change the verb form
is
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 no
consistence
Correct your spelling
consistency
show examples
Use synonyms
increase
Correct subject-verb agreement
increases
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 or
decrease
Correct subject-verb agreement
decreases
show examples
 in
this
Linking Words
 10
years
Use synonyms
 period.
Instead
Linking Words
, the
percentage
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 goes inconsistently up and down. The lowest
percent
Replace the word
percentage
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 in
this
Linking Words
 10
years
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 period is below 5% and the highest is approximately 7% to 8%. From 2000 to 2010, the chart demonstrates a consistent
increase
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 from 5% to 10%. And
finally
Linking Words
, from the
last
Linking Words
 10
years
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,
2010
Change preposition
from 2010
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 to 2020, the
percentage
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 of adolescents following a vegetarian diet remains relatively the same at 10% with little changes.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 86%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, years, increase with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 9 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reach" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 2 times.
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