The Chart below gives information about the age of women in Australia when they gave birth to their first child in 1966, 1986 and 2006.

The Chart below gives information about the age of women in Australia when they gave birth to their first child in 1966, 1986 and 2006.
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The bar graph compares the percentage change in the five
age
Use synonyms
categories of
women
Use synonyms
with the firstborn baby in Australia in 1966, 1986 and 2006.
Overall
Linking Words
, there
were
Change the verb form
was
show examples
a steady decrease in the category of young mothers,
while
Linking Words
middle-aged mothers displayed a noticeable growth during the three
period
Change to a plural noun
periods
show examples
. Mothers with a
first
Use synonyms
child at the
age
Use synonyms
over
Change preposition
of over
show examples
40
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
the lowest category in the whole period of time. In 1966, the highest figures of
women
Use synonyms
giving birth to their
first
Use synonyms
child were at the
age
Use synonyms
under
Change preposition
of
show examples
19 and 19-24
years
Use synonyms
, and constituted
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
approximately 34% and 62%, respectively. These in that two
age
Use synonyms
categories continued
falling
Correct article usage
a falling
show examples
trend and made up 12% for
women
Use synonyms
under 19 and just below 30% for
women
Use synonyms
19-24
years
Use synonyms
in 2006.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the other two middle-aged categories of
women
Use synonyms
with
firstborn
Add an article
the firstborn
show examples
child
Fix the agreement mistake
children
show examples
always had a rising trend. In 1966,
age
Use synonyms
groups 30-34 and 34-39 constituted
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
only around 12% and 8%, respectively. They
then
Linking Words
boomed by almost 4 times, and the
women
Use synonyms
with
firstborn
Add an article
a firstborn
show examples
baby
Fix the agreement mistake
babies
show examples
in
Change preposition
between
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
age
Replace the word
aged
show examples
30-34 and 34-39 made up 45% and 30%, respectively. Another two
age
Use synonyms
groups of
women
Use synonyms
giving
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
first
Use synonyms
birth that are over 40 and 25-30
years
Use synonyms
had an irregular pattern of rise and fall
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
recorded. The birth of
Use synonyms
first
Change the article
the first
show examples
baby
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the
age
Use synonyms
over
Change preposition
of over
show examples
40 was around 4% in 1966,
then
Linking Words
slightly decreased by 2% in 1986 and
then
Linking Words
it returned to previous levels in 2006. Almost the same trend was in the
age
Use synonyms
category between 25 and 30
years
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by ravshankhasanov99 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words age, women, first, years with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • demographic changes
  • first-time mothers
  • age bracket
  • fertility rate
  • childbearing age
  • socioeconomic factors
  • educational attainment
  • healthcare advancements
  • family planning
  • societal norms
  • trend analysis
  • delaying motherhood
What to do next:
Look at other essays: