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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that family has the most important influence on children’s development, while others believe that factors such as TV, friends, music and books have a more significant impact. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #influence #children’s #development #factors #tv #friends #music #books #impact
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In some perspectives,
parents
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 play essential roles to cultivate
children
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,
while
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 the opponents suggest that young individuals are more likely to be affected by other elements, including peers in classes, and the information they gain from the
internet
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 or books. On the one hand,
children
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 form the majority of common sense from their
parents
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 since they spent most of their time together. As it is said, like father like sun, the phrases as
such
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 display how
parents
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 can profoundly influence their
children
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, in which
the
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apply
show examples
most
of
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apply
show examples
descendants will inherit the accent and behaviours from their educators in childhood.
On the other hand
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, youth nowadays can easily access
to
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apply
show examples
information from various sources,
such
Linking Words
 as television programs; articles on the
internet
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 or on books; and music, which could extend their horizon and provide more input than that of
parents
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.
Moreover
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, a growing number of double-income families provoke a decrease in
time
Correct article usage
the time
show examples
parents
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 spent with their
children
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, which provides more time youth spend with their friends and peers.
For example
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, the younger generation now tends to seek suggestions from their friends or search on the
Internet
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 rather than ask their
parents
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.
To conclude
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, it is inevitable that
parents
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 play crucial roles form the personalities of their descendants at an early age.
However
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, I tend to believe that other sources of information have a more profound influence on young people since they will share more in common with those inputs on the
internet
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 or from friends than the perspectives from
parents
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.
Submitted by unapoya0916 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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