IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Today family members do not eat meals together. Why does this happen? Is this a positive or negative development Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#members #meals #happen #development
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Nowadays, families do not have a meal at one table and experts are trying to find out a reason for
this
. Personally, I believe that it affects negatively
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
reationships
Correct your spelling
relationships
. In the subsequent paragraphs,
this
 essay shall see my thoughts.
To begin
 with, there are several reasons why I argue with the following topic.
Firstly
, it affects the
duation
Correct your spelling
duration
 of the marriage and leads to
divorce
Correct article usage
the divorce
show examples
 of
parents
.
For example
,
they
Correct word choice
if they
show examples
 do not talk
each
Change preposition
to each
show examples
 other and their mindset will change. After that, they are not like-minded people.
Secondly
, it may cause
Correct article usage
a break
show examples
break up
Correct your spelling
break-up
show examples
 between
parents
 and child, because of not paying attention to
child's
Correct article usage
the child's
show examples
 breeding.
Therefore
,
parents
, who
works
Correct subject-verb agreement
work
show examples
 a lot, should pay
at
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for at
show examples
 least 30 minutes
for
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with
show examples
 their kids.
Finally
, it
also
 takes out happy times of family,
that is
, they spend their leisure
time
 without family. Households should always be together and help each other. If there is no connection between brothers,
these kind
Change the determiner
this kind
these kinds
show examples
 of relationships will be
reason
Add an article
the reason
a reason
show examples
 for
argue
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arguing
show examples
of
Change preposition
with
show examples
 them. So, family members should contact increasingly together. To illustrate,
me
Change the pronoun
I
show examples
 and my brother had not
spend
Change the verb form
spent
show examples
 a
lot
Add the preposition
oflot
show examples
time
 together because of my study.
That days
Change the determiner
That day
Those days
show examples
, we could not have common ideas and quickly
quarreled
Change the spelling
quarrelled
show examples
.
However
, in summer, we came to
peaceful
Add an article
a peaceful
show examples
 life. It shows that people should spend more and more
time
 with their
parents
 and care about them. In conclusion,
this
 essay argues about family relationships. In my opinion, either
parents
 or kids should pay some
time
for
Change preposition
with
show examples
 their close people, at least they should eat together.
Submitted by 29th of april on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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