Video games have become so widespread in recent years. What are the benefits and harms of video games?

Nowadays,

video

games

become more and more popular because the internet is fast and their graphic is vivid and attractive. Like two sides of a coin, they have pros and cons. In

this

eassay

Correct your spelling

essay

, we will discuss the advantages and

disadvatages

Correct your spelling

disadvantages

video

games

To begin

with, many

people

believe that

video

games

have many disadvantages, especially for children and teenagers.

Firstly

, they can become a kind of addiction.

Video

games

not only have interesting stories and beautiful

graphic

Replace the word

graphics

show examples

, but

also

they help

people

escape from their real life and become a hero in

virtual

Add an article

the virtual

a virtual

show examples

world.

This

makes

people

feel good about themselves and they keep playing for hours.

Finally

video

games

can have negative impacts

Change preposition

show examples

society because many violent

games

can make

people

become aggressive and violent.

For instance

, a gamer who plays too

much

Correct quantifier usage

many

show examples

violent

video

games

can really think he is the character and do bad things to other

people

On the other hand

video

games

also

have their good sides.

Firstly

, The main purpose of

video

games

helping

Change the verb form

to help

show examples

people

let their hair down.

Beside

Replace the word

Besides

show examples

television and social media,

video

games

are so entertaining and playful that it is a good choice for

peole

Correct your spelling

people

to relax after intense working and studying hours.

Finally

, they can help

people

improve their soft skills. Online

video

games

can help gamers communicate better.

In addition

people

can make friends abroad, so they can create their social network worldwide. In conclusion,

video

games

are a good way to entertain and they become so widespread

Change preposition

apply

show examples

these days. Personally, I think they are harmless if

people

do not spend too much time on them and treat them as a type of entertainment.

Submitted by khoitvhe130007 on Tue Apr 11 2023

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

281 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Video games have become so widespread in recent years. What are the benefits and harms of video games?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Writing task 2 (an essay) Nowadays, many people spend their free time watching movies. Why do they do that? Is it a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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Children find it difficult to concentrate on or pay attention to their studies in school. What are the reasons? How can we solve this problem?

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