IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The bar chart below illustrates five different industries’ percentage share of Brazil’s economy in 2009 and 2019 with a forecast for 2029. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The bar chart displays five different industries’ contributions to Brazil's
economy
Use synonyms
 as percentages of the total, in the years 2009, 2019 and 2029, with intervals of a
decade
Use synonyms
. Clearly, the Finance sector had the greatest contribution to Brazil’s
economy
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, and it is expected to do so in the future as well.
Secondly
Linking Words
,
Tourism
Use synonyms
,
as well as
Linking Words
 Fossil Fuels, are major contributors, and
lastly
Linking Words
, Food Processing and Manufacturing play a role in the total
economy
Use synonyms
 of Brazil. Going into
further
Linking Words
 detail, one-third of Brazil’s
economy
Use synonyms
 in 2009 was Finance, and
this
Linking Words
 increased by 5% a
decade
Use synonyms
 later and is expected to jump another 5% by 2029, at which time, it will be roughly 45% of the total. The second greatest contributors to the
economy
Use synonyms
 in 2009 were both
Tourism
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,
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apply
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 and Fossil Fuels at roughly a quarter of the total. A
decade
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 later,
Tourism
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 dropped to a fifth;
however
Linking Words
, Oil and Gas increased to about a third of the
economy
Use synonyms
. In 2029,
Tourism
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 is expected to be proportionally the same as in 2019, but Oil and Gas are expected to contribute about 5% less than the previous
decade
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, Food Processing and Manufacturing make up one-fifth or less of Brazil’s
economy
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 in any given year, and these industries tend to have much variability; Manufacturing decreases greatly with each
decade
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. In summary, Finance is the strongest economic sector, both past and future, as where the other sectors change from
decade
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 to
decade
Use synonyms
.

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words economy, decade, tourism with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "roughly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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