The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much.

The charts below show the average percentages in typical meals of three types of nutrients, all of which may be unhealthy if eaten too much.
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The pie charts illustrate the proportion of unhealthy nutrition supplements in three general meals consumed in the USA.
Overall
, it can be seen that people consume more
sodium
and saturated fat in their dinner,
while
they eat sugar contained items with their snacks.
Moreover
, it is
noticable
Correct your spelling
noticeable
notable
that all nutrition supplements
almost
Add a missing verb
are almost
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equally contained in their breakfast.
Firstly
, the proportion of
sodium
is equally distributed in breakfast and snacks which made up 14%,
while
the percentage of
sodium
in lunch
twice
Add a missing verb
is twice
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higher. The dinner contains
the
Correct article usage
a
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higher proportion of
sodium
and saturated fat by 43% and 37%, respectively.
Moreover
, breakfast contains the same rate of added sugar and saturated fat which is 16%,
however
, these nutrition supplements in the snacks made up 42% and 21%, respectively.
On the other hand
, added sugar incorporates with dinner which is accounted for 23%,
while
for lunch it makes 19%.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "moreover, while".
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words sodium with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Nutrients
  • Unhealthy
  • Daily intake
  • Percentage
  • Carbohydrates
  • Fats
  • Proteins
  • Meals
  • Balanced diet
  • Consumption
  • Excess
  • Health implications
  • Obesity
  • Diabetes
  • Heart disease
  • Convenience foods
  • Fast foods
  • Socioeconomic factors
  • Lifestyle choices
  • Healthy eating habits
  • Dietary recommendations
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