IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

TASK1 The maps show the changes of Bell Hill Farm in 1976 and 2006. (Bell Hill Farm in 1976 Bill Hill Environmental Centre 2006) Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Instructions to follow • •

TASK1 The maps show the changes of Bell Hill Farm in 1976 and 2006. (Bell Hill Farm in 1976 Bill Hill Environmental Centre 2006) Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant. Instructions to follow • •
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The map depicts the evolution of Bell Hill Environmental Centre, from Bell Hill Farm, in 30 years. in comparison to those years,
it is clear that
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 there was a significant transformation occurred in Bill Hill. In 1976,
firstly
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, there was a barn which stored grain in the middle of the map,
,
Change the punctuation
apply
show examples
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secondly
Add a comma
,secondly
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 the cow sheds were placed to the right.
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Furthermore
Add a comma
,Furthermore
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 agricultural machinery is on the top left of it.
On the other hand
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, in 2006, the barn was transformed into a multimedia room, evermore the cow and chicken sheds were rid of it and
was
Change the verb form
were
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 built student housing
instead
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.
In addition
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, the agricultural park lot turned into a parking area. Despite changing those lands, the farmhouse was still the same where it was.
To sum up
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,
although
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 the farmhouse had not been changed, many buildings had been replaced over time.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "map" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • transformation
  • ecological preservation
  • sustainable practices
  • renewable energy
  • educational facilities
  • recreational use
  • agricultural productivity
  • environmental education
  • farm infrastructure
  • visitor centre
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