It is better for people to be unemployed than being employed with a job they do not enjoy. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #job

It is thought that being employed with a compelling and undesirable

job

worse

Add a missing verb

is worse

show examples

than being unemployed in terms of individuals. I mostly disagree with

this

suggestion because

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

those who are

being

Verb problem

apply

show examples

jobless have more

problems

in terms of psychological and

economical

Correct word choice

economic

show examples

in comparison to the rest.

Firstly

, individuals who are unemployed may suffer psychological

issues

Although

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

employed ones have complaints about their

job

, unemployed ones demand their

problems

because they feel useless and need some activities. In the absence of a particular

job

, they may become lazier and more depressed gradually. To illustrate that, many unemployed characters may give up waking up early in time and they do not face

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

their situation.

In addition

, they may blame themselves even

they

Correct word choice

if they

show examples

have not any

failure

Fix the agreement mistake

failures

show examples

. In short, they usually do not be happy in these situations more than others who have some

issues

in their business lives.

Secondly

, jobless individuals probably have some economic

issues

. They do not obtain money to meet their needs and they feel inadequate

while

others earn even though they have

problems

. Their sufferings usually excel undesirable

problems

in business life and they opt to work

bad

Change preposition

in bad

show examples

circumstances

instead

of being jobless.

For instance

, many people in Turkey are working in unsatisfied jobs and they avoid being unemployed because they

acknowledged

Wrong verb form

acknowledge

show examples

that probable economic

issue

Fix the agreement mistake

issues

show examples

may create other

issues

. In

short

Add a comma

short,

show examples

due to

its

Change the word

the

show examples

economic and

likelihood

Correct article usage

the likelihood

show examples

problems

Change preposition

of problems

show examples

in future, being employed in a problematic situation is better than being unemployed.

To sum up

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

causes and examples can be multiplied with

this

suggestion.

Although

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

unattractive

Correct article usage

the unattractive

show examples

ambience and situation of a

job

lets people

to thinking

Wrong verb form

think

show examples

for

Change preposition

show examples

being unemployed, in my opinion, it is a harsher circumstance for employed ones

due to

its psychological and

economical

Replace the word

economic

show examples

burdens. 44 dk.

Submitted by metehancakiroglu3435 on Wed Apr 12 2023

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task response

Your essay addresses the topic but lacks a clear stance on the issue. It is important to clearly state whether you agree or disagree with the prompt. Make sure to present a clear argument with relevant examples to support your stance.

coherence and cohesion

The essay displays a logical sequence of ideas and uses linking words and phrases effectively. However, it would benefit from a clearer introduction and conclusion to better frame the discussion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

293 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Job satisfaction
Mental and emotional well-being
Stress
Depression
Financial instability
Quality of life
Job dissatisfaction
Career goals
Skills and experiences
Networking opportunities
Social isolation
Productivity

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It is better for people to be unemployed than being employed with a job they do not enjoy. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The increase in the production of consumer goods results in damage to the natural environment. What are the causes of this? What can be done to solve this problem?

some feel that cities shold be designed to be beautiul while others feel their functionality is more important discuss both sides and your opinion

Nowadays, many people change jobs quite regularly, rather than working in the one company for their entire careers. Why do you think this is happening? How can companies keep their workers?

In some countries there are more young people choosing to enroll in work-based training instead of attending university. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?