the two pie charts below show some employment patterns in Great Britain in 1992

#two #show #employment #patterns #britain

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The pie charts illustrate information about the patterns of some careers of both males and females in Great Britain in 1992.

Overall

, it can be seen that the total of non-manual

employment

; manager and professional, clerical or related and other types had a major proportion of female careers,

while

the sum of the percentage of manual and non-manual

employment

in males had the slightly same proportion. For female non-manual career information, both

clerical

Correct article usage

the clerical

show examples

or related

group

and the managerial and professional

group

had over half at 60% and were at 31% and 29% respectively, meanwhile the total of manual

employment

; craft or similar, general labourers and

other

Correct pronoun usage

others

show examples

were just 31% Turning to male

employment

information, the biggest number of careers was managerial and professional in the non-manual

group

at 36%. Another manual was 24%

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the second biggest proportion and third was craft or similar career of the manual

group

at 26%

while

other manual

employment

, clerical or related

group

career and general labourers were the small part at 6%, 6% and just only 2% respectively.

Submitted by vanil on Thu Apr 13 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words employment, group with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 3 times.

▼

2
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

176 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some people think it’s better to choose friends who always have the same opinions as them. Other people believe it’s good to have friends who sometimes disagree with them. Discuss both these views and give own your opinion
Friends are an essential part of life. It is often argued by some individuals that companions need to be selected based on whether they match our thinking or not . While some individuals mention that it is required to have friends who do not agree with our thoughts. In my opinion, I would be with a friend who agrees with me in all possible ways because it makes the relationship clear. However, others would like to be around people who sometimes have different opinions, so that It will help them prosper in life.
8.5
band
You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter * say why he/she would not enjoy going to college * explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her * suggest types of job that would be suitable for him/her
I hope you are very well. I am writing to you to share my thoughts on the decisions you'll make about your future.
<4
band
Cách mạng Công nghiệp 4.0 đang diễn ra. Nó mang đến cho nhân loại cơ hội để thay đổi bộ mặt các nền kinh tế qua Internet vạn vật, các hệ thống thực ảo, giao tiếp, cộng tác với nhau.
Nowadays, more and more people are able to approach the internet, leading to e-learning has exploded. With the population of e-learning, some people believe that physical classrooms are redundancy. As a author of this essay, I totally disgree with this statement due to the limitation in communicating skills and the lack of assistance during studying. First of all, learning at the traditional classroom provide students the opportunities to meet other students and friends. In the other words, assisting their communicating abilities through working with other students, while e-learning do not have many opportunities to talk with classmate or teachers. For examples, interactive activities and live discussions allow students to enhance their communicating skills and confidences during talking with strangers. Furthermore, the existance of traditional classrooms is becoming vital due to the development of technology. because more and more courses such as physic or chemistry are being neede...
<4
band
Last month you had an overseas hoiday with some friends where you stayed at their house. They have just sent you some holiday photos. Write a letter to your friends.
Hope you all are good.I just saw our Dubai holiday phtotos which I recevied by Ratesh today. Firstly, when I saw our all trip membories are came in front of my eyes. I have plan for our winter holiday too. If you all are agree can be go again on trip somewere ? However, I received our all pictures but, I did not get our house photos. Those ones were really good thought. Furthermore, I wish we can meet again as soon as possible,For now good wishes to all of you from your friend.
7.5
band
A cafe near your home puts some chairs and tables on the pavement for customers. This creates a problem for you. Write a letter to the cafe manager to complain about this matter. In your letter describe the problem; explain how it affects you; say what you will do if this matter is not resolved.
I am writing in dissatisfaction with the inconvenience caused by Hope cafe at Bay road. Your cafe is just beside my apartment. I would to bring to your attention the problem I faced with the placement of chairs and tables on the pavement for customers.

the two pie charts below show some employment patterns in Great Britain in 1992

Some people think it’s better to choose friends who always have the same opinions as them. Other people believe it’s good to have friends who sometimes disagree with them. Discuss both these views and give own your opinion

Cách mạng Công nghiệp 4.0 đang diễn ra. Nó mang đến cho nhân loại cơ hội để thay đổi bộ mặt các nền kinh tế qua Internet vạn vật, các hệ thống thực ảo, giao tiếp, cộng tác với nhau.

Last month you had an overseas hoiday with some friends where you stayed at their house. They have just sent you some holiday photos. Write a letter to your friends.

A cafe near your home puts some chairs and tables on the pavement for customers. This creates a problem for you. Write a letter to the cafe manager to complain about this matter. In your letter describe the problem; explain how it affects you; say what you will do if this matter is not resolved.