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Band 4.5

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. Do you agree or disagree?

#government #investment #arts #music #theatre #waste #money #governments #services
News all over the world is saying that governments are laying out money on the
arts
. They think it will help
people
 to keep the traditions alive
as well as
 being entertained,
,
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however
Add a comma
,however
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 it seems that the majority of
people
 would disagree with those decisions
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, on the other hand,
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on the other hand
 They demand better public services
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
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therefore
 the money must be put into it. On the one hand, those who think the government investment in
arts
 will protect the legacy of ancestors
,
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while
 helping the younger generations to learn about their history and culture. for ,example festivals, theatres and particular events related to a particular culture will be Both enjoyable and informative. Another advantage of
this
 decision is that
arts
 will help
people
 to improve their mental health, meaning that
people
 feel
more happy
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happier
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 and more satisfied in life. By ,contrast opponents of
this
 view point out that
the
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society has many more important and vital demands
for instance
, public services
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 one
the
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them many believe that a lack of public services will lead to chaos and dissatisfaction in a country
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
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therefore
 the fund should be spent on those things.
Finally
, it must be considered that not all the
people
 actually like
arts
 because their interest lie
elsewhere
thus
 government should consider something else for
this
 group.
Overall
, it is logical
to conclude
 the decision to put money into
arts
 really depends on
people
 and the amount of wealth rather than a general view. The decision need to make
while
 considering both real necessities and
people
's interests.
Submitted by shojaeinejad_m on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural enrichment
  • expression of creativity
  • promote diversity
  • enhance social cohesion
  • boost tourism
  • job creation
  • stimulate economic growth
  • improve quality of life
  • essential services
  • maintenance and development
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