The 3 graphs below describe the changes in yearly expenses by local authorities in Someland over a period of 20 years.
The shown pie charts
illustratea
the changes in annual spending by local authorities in Someland in 1980, 1990 and 2000.
Correct your spelling
illustrate
illustrates
It is clear that
in Someland government
spends more money Correct article usage
the government
to
higher Change preposition
on
education
than other aspects.
For example
, the overwhelming majority of budjet
spending Correct your spelling
budget
to
higher Change preposition
on
education
was in 1990 in comparison with 1980. The figures were 45 and thirty five
per Add a hyphen
thirty-five
cent
respectively.
Furthermore
, for education
sector in 2000 Add an article
the education
were
spent Unnecessary verb
apply
fifty eight
per Add a hyphen
fifty-eight
cent
, whereas
the figures in 1990 were hefty
Correct article usage
a hefty
sixty five
per Add a hyphen
sixty-five
cent
.
Meanwhile, for environmental services
the pattern appears to be slightly different.
Add a comma
services,
Moreover
, low
difference is in Add an article
the low
other sector
, hesitation is between one and 6 per Change the wording
another sector
other sectors
cent
.
Most
expensive sphere in Add an article
The most
A most
economy
in 1990 Add an article
the economy
an economy
is
Wrong verb form
was
education
(65 per cent
), but out of this
only twenty per cent
is k-12 education
, which is only one five.Submitted by dnm.best on
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the seventh paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words education, cent with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the seventh paragraph.
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