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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

According to some people, it would be better if industries are established in regions outside the urban area. Discuss its advantages and disadvantages.

#people #industries #regions #area
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More and more people are advocating for shifting of
industries
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 from the
city
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area
Use synonyms
 to the outskirts of it since it is playing
pivotal
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a pivotal
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 role in spreading pollution across the metro
area
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. Relocating them to a remote place from the
city
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 has certain benefits
along with
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few
Correct article usage
a few
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 drawbacks. Both its pros and
the
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apply
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cons are explained in the following paragraphs.
To begin
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 with, more and more
industries
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 are occupying space in metropolitan
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area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
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,
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as
Correct word choice
and as
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 a
result
Add the comma(s)
,result
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 people are now finding
hard
Correct pronoun usage
it hard
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 to find a suitable place to live in a
city
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.
Moreover
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, they are forced to live near hazardous industrial
are
Correct your spelling
area
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Linking Words
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 is the primary reason for
detoriating
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deteriorating
health
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the health
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 of many.
Furthermore
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,
ecosystem
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the ecosystem
an ecosystem
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 is one
the
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of the
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 most adversely affected
are
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apply
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owing to rapid industrialization. To
examplify
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exemplify
,
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the numbers
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numbers
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number
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 of sparrows has reduced to its extinction in a decade
due to
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 heavy
industries
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. Replacing
industries
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to
Change preposition
in
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 the periphery
area
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a
Change preposition
of a
show examples
city
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 will certainly reduce pollution
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that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 is the prominent reason for many diseases in cities. If the industry is established in
village
Correct article usage
a village
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are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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than
Replace the word
then
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 more people
form
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from
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 the same village and
near by
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nearby
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 villages can get employment. It would be beneficial for the company itself as the cost of land outside
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city
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the city
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 is less as compared to
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city
Correct article usage
the city
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area
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 and
as a result
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 their capital investment can be saved for another operation of
company
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the company
a company
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.
For instance
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, Tata
motors
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Motors
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has
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have
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 purchased a huge piece of land
in
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on
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 the outskirts of Ahmedabad that has saved
their
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apply
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300 crores rupees which they invested in
training
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the training
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of
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apply
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freshers.
To
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In
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 conclusion,
Although
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,
an
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the
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 industrial revolution has made our life
simplier
Correct your spelling
simpler
 than ever, there have been
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 consequences
such
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 as
green house
Correct your spelling
greenhouse
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 effect that cannot be ignored.relocating companies from the
city
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 place to a village is not only beneficial for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human beings but
also
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 for the whole ecosystem.
Submitted by robinmacwan on

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Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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