IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think students should study the science of food and how to prepare it. Others think that school time should be used in learning important subjects. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #students #study #science #food #school #time #subjects
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
On the one hand, there are several convincing reasons why it is necessary to teach
students
 about food science and its preparation.
Firstly
, children can be provided with opportunities to acquire a wealth of knowledge in the food field. After having access to the substances and nutrients,
students
 will be aware of the positive and negative effects of these ingredients.
As a result
, children can control the amount of intake and adopt a balanced diet, which can help them improve their
overall
 health status and avoid serious diseases.
Moreover
, the curriculum of food science will provide
students
 with practical knowledge. It is evident that they can enhance their cooking
skills
, which is one of the most crucial soft
skills
 for their independent living.
On the other hand
, I am in
favor
Change the spelling
favour
show examples
 of the idea that all compulsory subjects should be focused on during school time. First of all, academic subjects lay a solid foundation for learners. It is true that
students
 will be equipped with fundamental knowledge for examinations.
Hence
, when they have-> gain outstanding results or record higher achievements, it is much easier for them to apply for future jobs after graduation.
Furthermore
, academic subjects will improve other important
skills
.
In other words
,
students
 can have practical lessons in which they are capable of developing communication and teamwork abilities. It is obvious that these
skills
 play a crucial role in the comprehensive development of
students
.
Submitted by maianhdt12 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: