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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some people brave dad it is best to accept a bad situation such as an unsatisfactory job are shortage of money other are you dad it is better to try and improve your situation discuss both these views and give your opinion

#people #dad #situation #job #shortage #money
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In
this
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 day and age, most
community
Change to a plural noun
communities
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 face many problems in their professional field like
the
Correct article usage
apply
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unsatisfactory
jobs
Use synonyms
 or limited salaries
while
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 others struggle for improvement.I personally feel that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 the struggle can give a better life to individuals
as well as
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 makes them financially strong.I will explain both views and
also
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 my pinpoint in a forthcoming paragraph. To inaugurate with,most of the people have been doing
jobs
Use synonyms
 that are not engaging themselves
as well as
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, don't have attractive salary packages. Because their whole family is dependent on them and they don't in form of taking a risk to find another job. To be more precise, a person who fulfils all requirements of his family by a profession with limited payment.It's more difficult for him to find another place
for
Change preposition
to
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 work with a handsome salary in another workplace away from his home town and spend a couple of hours on the commute to their workplace.Sometimes he doesn't have much time for having the best opportunity in his life .
Thus
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, these are some reasons why many people adjust themselves to low wages
jobs
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
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, in
this
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 modern era,
due to
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 the latest innovations, people have different opportunities to improve themselves in their desired departments. They can get a lot of data related to their fields and improve their skills
such
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 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 communication skills and work hard to boost their career and become financially strong. By working and taking risks in their lives. Some do part-time
jobs
Use synonyms
 after studies to support their families and get a lot of experience in their profession in different places. My opinion is that
,
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apply
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 one can choose to act in both situations
according to
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 the situation.
Firstly
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 he fulfilled his primary needs and after that struggled to make himself financially stable
To conclude
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, the new trend in society to doing work with less satisfaction because of some factors like
due to
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 convincing problems
although
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, the effort for a better existence can give their children all the amenities of growth, and enhance the experience in their field.
Submitted by aqsagoraya9 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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