Some people believe that hobbies need to be difficult to be enjoyable. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many

people

consider that a particular level of difficulty is needed for pastimes to be pleasurable. I completely disagree with

this

idea, since what types of leisure activities

people

like depends mainly on each individual’s personality and preferences. From a personal perspective, it is arguable that certain recreational activities lack the element of difficulty, leading to some

people

believing less amount of joy is brought to us by them.

For instance

, pastimes

such

as watching a movie or listening to music might be considered by some as boring or not enjoyable enough, since the lack of appeal and excitement

Change preposition

show examples

the outlook.

However

, we cannot assume the importance of these simple acts of relaxation on

people

, because we have no way of knowing what those individuals’ needs are during their

time

leisuring

Correct your spelling

leisure

Furthermore

, the way

people

spend their free

time

is mostly determined by their personalities and their needs.

For example

, some may prefer to be

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

couch

potato

Fix the agreement mistake

potatoes

show examples

when they have free

time

, and yet

this

simple act can be fun to him or her as much as going out and doing sports are for others. Some

people

are fond of things that are physically or mentally challenging,

while

others crave something relaxing and soothing.

For example

, someone may enjoy playing a game of chess

while

the other may love to listen to music when they are taking a break from work or study. Neither one nor the other is of greater importance; meaning that everyone can feel

rewarding

Wrong verb form

rewarded

show examples

and relaxed after spending a particular amount of

time

doing something that they love.

To conclude

, I am against the advocates who have the idea of hobbies

needing

Wrong verb form

need

show examples

to be difficult to be enjoyable, because the idea of leisure activities

are

Correct subject-verb agreement

show examples

very subjective and personal to every unique individual.

Submitted by pyaekyitharchaw884 on Sat May 06 2023

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

300 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

unique challenge
personal growth
mastery
accomplishment
demanding
thrill of achievement
pastimes
fostering
sense of community
mindfulness
stress relief
mental break
daily stressors

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Some people believe that hobbies need to be difficult to be enjoyable. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Mobile phones should be banned in public places such as libraries and shops and on public transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Inorder to solve traffic problem, governments should tax private car owners heavily and use their money to improve public transportation. what are the advantages and disadvantages of such solutions

Some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people, while others believe that the purpose of museums is to educate. Discuss both views and give you own opinion.