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Writing Samples
Band 4

The diagram below shows how electricity is generated in a hydroelectric power station. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The diagram below shows how electricity is generated in a hydroelectric power station. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The figure demonstrates how the generation of electricity in a hydroelectric
power
Use synonyms
 station
differ
Correct subject-verb agreement
differs
show examples
 between day and night. The most noticeable difference between the hydroelectric
power
Use synonyms
 station’s operation during day and night is the dam. The
flow
Use synonyms
 of
water
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
differ
Change the verb form
differs
show examples
 with regard to the
turbines
Use synonyms
.
It is clear that
Linking Words
 the dam is open,
water
Use synonyms
 gathered from
river
Add an article
the river
a river
show examples
 in
high-level
Add an article
the high-level
a high-level
show examples
reservoir
Use synonyms
 to
flow
Use synonyms
 down to the
reversibles
Correct your spelling
reversible
turbines
Use synonyms
 for operating the generation in
Use synonyms
Power
Add an article
a Power
the Power
show examples
 station.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the
water
Use synonyms
 is
flow
Use synonyms
 from
low level
Add a hyphen
low-level
show examples
reservoir
Use synonyms
 and
pumped
Add a missing verb
is pumped
show examples
 through the reversible
turbines
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
, the
flow
Use synonyms
 of
water
Use synonyms
 is from
low-level
Correct article usage
a low-level
show examples
reservoir
Use synonyms
 to a high-level
reservoir
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the dam is closed,
which
Correct word choice
where
show examples
 the intake of
water
Use synonyms
 is stored.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the generator in the hydroelectric
power
Use synonyms
 station
generate
Change the verb form
generates
show examples
 electricity and
then
Linking Words
 through the
power
Use synonyms
 lines and
finally
Linking Words
 into the national grid in the day.
Conversely
Linking Words
, the plant used to pump
water
Use synonyms
 from
low-level
Correct article usage
a low-level
show examples
reservoir
Use synonyms
 to
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
high level
Add a hyphen
high-level
show examples
reservoir
Use synonyms
 in order to reverse
turbines
Use synonyms
 for generating electricity at night.

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
▼
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words power, flow, water, turbines, reservoir with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • hydroelectric power station
  • reservoir
  • potential energy
  • mechanical energy
  • electrical energy
  • turbine
  • generator
  • renewable energy
  • fossil fuels
  • emissions
  • power lines
  • gate-controlled tunnels
  • gravity-driven
  • transformation
  • clean energy source
  • sustainable
  • recycled water
  • mountainous area
  • activate
  • transmit
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