some employers offer their employees subsided membership of gyms and sports club.believing that it will make their staff healthier and thus more effective at work.Others see no benefit in doing so.Discuss both views and give your opinion

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Few entrepreneurs to make their workers stronger and healthier, give them a good opportunity to start being a member in different

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

centers

Change the spelling

centres

show examples

, gyms and clubs.

However

Linking Words

, employees are divided into two groups, part of which think that it will not impact well and the second one is not against

about

Change preposition

apply

show examples

it.

This

Linking Words

essay will discuss

such

Linking Words

kind of decision of employers and I will make my own point of view about it.

First

Correct article usage

The first

show examples

thing, which is worth mentioning, is that

work

Use synonyms

in offices can make staff a bit exhausted and tired, because of too

much task

Fix the agreement mistake

many tasks

show examples

, that were given by

employer

Add an article

the employer

show examples

As a result

Linking Words

, sitting at the computer or writing documents for 6-9 hours, make

person's

Correct article usage

a person's

show examples

all muscles not

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

active,

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

will lead to negative consequence when they are 50 or 60 years old,

such

Linking Words

as troubles with vision and posture will not be functioned.

Correct article usage

The next

show examples

coming

arguement

Correct your spelling

argument

is as essential as the first one,

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

concerns their emotional position. When people are angry and not in the mood, just to make them calm and less

nervious

Correct your spelling

nervous

, the best thing to solve it, is to go to the gym boxing or

kicking

Wrong verb form

kick

show examples

punching

Add an article

a punching

show examples

bag

Fix the agreement mistake

bags

show examples

. It really helps and

also

Linking Words

releases

Change preposition

apply

show examples

dopamine from the organism.

However

Linking Words

, if

worker

Add an article

a worker

the worker

show examples

decides not to go to the

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

club and continue stressing, it will impact badly not only on the quality of

work

Use synonyms

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

Linking Words

on his mental health. So, just to avoid any depression, stressing or being always

nervious

Correct your spelling

nervous

, people can only go to the gym and spend there almost 1,5-2 hours.

To conclude

Linking Words

, in my opinion, just to do

work

Use synonyms

and tasks well, not to be angry and

nervious

Correct your spelling

nervous

every day, employees definitely should go to the gym. And

that is

Linking Words

not a secret that, you should attend any

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

clubs or gyms

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

if you want not only to keep fit, to be stronger and healthier, but

also

Linking Words

to keep calm, stay refreshed, be

positive-thinking

Add an article

a positive-thinking

the positive-thinking

show examples

person and make

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

work

Use synonyms

well.

zhdanova_veronikTue May 09 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
26
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

332 words

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some employers offer their employees subsided membership of gyms and sports club.believing that it will make their staff healthier and thus more effective at work.Others see no benefit in doing so.Discuss both views and give your opinion

Fully explain your ideas

It is generally believed that some people are born with certain talents, for instance for sports or music, and others are not. However, it is sometimes claimed that any child can be taught to become a good sports person or musician. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and their levels of health and fitness are decreasing. What do you think are the cause of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

Some people think that exercise is the key to health while others feel that having a balanced diet is more important

Some individuals say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.