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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart below gives information about vehicle ownership in China. Summarise the differences and comaprisons.

The bar chart below gives information about vehicle ownership in China. Summarise the differences and comaprisons.
The graph illustrates data regarding the rights of possessing a vehicle in China.
Overall
Linking Words
, a steady increment can be seen in the number of vehicles per thousand people over the years, from 1987 to 1999. There are less than 500 vehicles owned by 1000 people in the
year
Use synonyms
 1987 and there was only a little
increase
Use synonyms
 in the numbers until 1993.
However
Linking Words
, there was a dramatic
increase
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 from the
year
Use synonyms
 1993 to 1995,
where
Correct word choice
when
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 the number of transports increased from around 1000 to nearly 2000, with figures doubling. From 1995 to 1999, their rate of
increase
Use synonyms
 is greater than the rate of
increase
Use synonyms
 in the previous 6 years.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the increment steps were exceeding 1000, from the
year
Use synonyms
 1997 to 1999. In the
year
Use synonyms
 1999, the
amount
Change the quantifier
number
show examples
 of vehicles exceeded 4000 per one thousand people.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words year, increase with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 5 times.
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