The pie charts compare the amount of online shopping sales for retail parts in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Moreover, those are divided into four categories: travel, film/music, book, and clothes.

#amount #sales #parts #zealand #four #categories #travel #film #music #book #clothes

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The pie charts compare the number of online shopping sales for retail parts in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013.

Moreover

, those are divided into four categories:

travel

film

music

book

, and

clothes

Overall

, it can be clearly observed that the vast majority of

film

music

online sales from 2003 and 2013 experienced a dramatically rose, and

books

Change the noun form

book

show examples

sales presented a slight growth as well.

On the other hand

travel

Correct article usage

the travel

show examples

and

clothes

sectors underwent a downward ratio in the later year. Starting with 2003,

the

Correct article usage

show examples

large percentage of online retail was

travel

sector accounting for 36% and followed by

clothes

at 24%,

film

music

at 21%, and

book

Wrong verb form

booking

show examples

solely

Change preposition

at 19

show examples

%, respectively. From 2013 onwards, The highest number of retail online in New Zealand was

film

music

responsible for 33 per

cent

, followed by

travel

at 29 per

cent

, and

book

at 22 per

cent

, and

clothes

at only 16 per

cent

, respectively.

However

, in

this

respect

Add a comma

,respect

show examples

the

film

and

book

were

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

continued growing compared with other sectors.

Submitted by nuchnapa.anna on Sun May 14 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 89%.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words travel, film, music, book, clothes, cent with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "compare" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "compare" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.

▼

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

163 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
Some people believe that technology has made man more social. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Write at least 250 words
In this modern world, the use of technology is on the rise. There is a general claim that modern technology helps reduce the distance between public members. It is agreed that the advantage of science in computers and smartphones has brought many good impacts for humans in general. Analyzing the telecommunication infrastructure as well as the growth in the number of modern applications on smartphones nowadays will prove this.
6.5
band
University students should be required to attend classes. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this idea?
With an ever-increasing focus on students' class engagements, some individuals have opined that attending classes should be mandatory for university students. This essay, however, will provide several reasons why I strongly disagree with this opinion.
4.5
band
Some people believe that there should be fixed punishment for each type of crime. Others, However, argue that the curcumstances of an individual crime. an the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishment. Discuss both views and give your opinion
Many people are believing that there are be fixed pinalty for classification of crime. Another, society argued that it depend on the condition a person who has a crime . Then what causes them to do, it would be determination on the punihsment. This essay wiil discuss both views.
7.5
band
In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this?
Nowadays, most nations have problems with land around the city because they are looking for a place to build apartments. Some say that we do not need to build apartments in the countryside to protect nature. Personally, I do not agree with this idea, and in this essay, I will support my opinion with examples.
4.5
band
Some people think that men and women have different qualities, therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others for women. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?
Nature has blessed both men and women with individual characters, which set them apart. All these different characteristics enable them to do different tasks according to their affinities. Due to this, some people opine that it would be best for both sexes to involve themselves in those tasks which suit their personality and skill sets. Others, however, think that both are equal and can do each other’s job as efficiently as they can do their own. Therefore, let us analyse the task from both perspectives in order to reach to a relevant conclusion.

The pie charts compare the amount of online shopping sales for retail parts in New Zealand in 2003 and 2013. Moreover, those are divided into four categories: travel, film/music, book, and clothes.

Some people believe that technology has made man more social. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion? Write at least 250 words

University students should be required to attend classes. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this idea?

Some people believe that there should be fixed punishment for each type of crime. Others, However, argue that the curcumstances of an individual crime. an the motivation for committing it, should always be taken into account when deciding on the punishment. Discuss both views and give your opinion

In many places, new homes are needed, but the only space available for building them is in the countryside. Some people believe it is more important to protect the countryside and not build new homes there. What is your opinion about this?

Some people think that men and women have different qualities, therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others for women. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?