IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph and pie chart below show information on crime in the UK for the last year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#line #show #information #crime #uk #year #summarise #features #comparisons
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The graphic shows a breakdown of
crime
Use synonyms
 statistics in the UK for
last
Linking Words
 year. The line graph shows the interrelation between criminal activity and
age
Use synonyms
while
Linking Words
 the pie chart illustrates the proportion of four different
crime
Use synonyms
 types. When looking at the line graph it is immediately clear that young
people
Use synonyms
 accounted for a disproportionately high level of
crime
Use synonyms
last
Linking Words
 year and that the
age
Use synonyms
 at which
people
Use synonyms
 are involved in criminal activity peaks at twenty with nearly a million
crimes
Use synonyms
 being committed by
people
Use synonyms
 of
this
Linking Words
age
Use synonyms
. The number of
crimes
Use synonyms
then
Linking Words
 plummeted before levelling off at 28. the likelihood of being involved in criminal activity continued to decline with
age
Use synonyms
. Of the
crimes
Use synonyms
 identified in the bar chart, violent
crime
Use synonyms
 was the most common at nearly half of the total, and there were twice as many
crimes
Use synonyms
 involving violence as there were property or drug
Use synonyms
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
. Less serious
anti social
Add a hyphen
anti-social
show examples
behaviour related
Add a hyphen
behaviour-related
show examples
crime
Use synonyms
 was relatively low.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 young
people
Use synonyms
 were much more likely to be the perpetrators of
crime
Use synonyms
 and that the majority of
this
Linking Words
crime
Use synonyms
 was violence related.
Submitted by marvinda.pereira on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words crime, age, people, crimes with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "shows" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • The line graph depicts
  • The pie chart illustrates
  • reveals
  • displays
  • depicts
  • the trend of
  • the overall crime rate
  • steadily decreased
  • the distribution of
  • different types of crime
  • prevalent
  • accounts for
  • the most common crime
  • followed by
  • make up
  • a smaller proportion of
  • the total crimes
  • a smaller percentage
  • approximately
  • the remaining percentage
  • It is important to note that
  • reflects
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