IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3.5

Because of the global economy many goods including what we use as daily basics produced by other countries have to be transported for a long distance to what extent do the adantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#economy #goods #basics #countries #distance #adantages
Now we live in a life
Change preposition
in
show examples
which is everything
avaible
Correct your spelling
available
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
everywhere.
Goods
 which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 necessary for our daily life is
trasported
Correct your spelling
transported
 from
other country
Change the wording
another country
other countries
show examples
 to another
for
Change preposition
over
show examples
 a long distance.In my view
benefits
Correct article usage
the benefits
show examples
 outweigh
drawbacks
Correct article usage
the drawbacks
show examples
. On the positive side if
goods
 transport
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 countries all over the world we will have
possibluties
Correct your spelling
possibilities
 to taste different types of fruits.
For example
last
 year we had
not
Correct your spelling
no
show examples
chance
Add an article
a chance
the chance
show examples
 to partake
mango
Change preposition
in mango
show examples
 or
marakuya
Correct your spelling
maracuja
 but now you can find them everywhere.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
side
Add a comma
,side
show examples
 we did not try any popular brands like Gucci or Dior.But now they filled in every store.You know everything is not
Correct your spelling
about
anout
Correct your spelling
about
 fruits or brands,we have chances
try
Fix the infinitive
to try
show examples
 everything in lots of ways
Furthermore
Add a comma
,Furthermore
show examples
 now many
pople
Correct your spelling
people
 have
function
Add an article
a function
show examples
 in small businesses. Kind of exporting things help make
relationship
Add an article
the relationship
a relationship
show examples
 between them.
Also
Add a comma
,Also
show examples
 it
lead
Change the verb form
leads
show examples
well-being
Change preposition
to well-being
show examples
 in every country.You know
economy
Add an article
the economy
show examples
 is
essential
Add an article
an essential
show examples
 topic in our lifestyle.
This
 topic
also
 does not immune if we
comincate
Correct your spelling
communicate
 with each other.
Then
 there will be
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
 conflicts between us. On the downside, transporting
goods
 can lead disappearance of our
cultire
Correct your spelling
culture
.We can take
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
for example
.
In these
Change preposition
These
show examples
 days exported meals
more
Add a missing verb
are more
show examples
 popular than traditional ones.Everyone wants to try new
kind
Fix the agreement mistake
kinds
show examples
 of foods.It already became our habit to eat foreign meals.Another downside is pollution.
Convey
Wrong verb form
Conveying
show examples
 things in
air
Correct article usage
the air
show examples
 or
water way
Correct your spelling
waterway
show examples
 contribute
contamination
Change preposition
to contamination
show examples
.It has lots of effects
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 our life. To
coclude
Correct your spelling
conclude
,importing
goods
 has
also
 cons,but
like
Correct word choice
as
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 mentioned merit outweigh demerits.
Submitted by ieltsteaching0 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: