Some people believe that governments should ban dangerous sports even though others claim they should have the freedom to choose a sport to their liking. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

#people #governments #ban #sports #freedom #sport #support

Nowadays there is a variety of different

sports

that involved

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

physical

risk

Change the noun form

risks

show examples

such

as rock climbing

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

can

cause

long term

Add a hyphen

long-term

show examples

damage and even death. Some state that

people

should be able to choose what sport they want to engage in, no matter what the risk is.

However

, I am opposed to that idea and I believe that the government should ban certain

sports

in order to keep their citizens safe. In

this

essay

Add a comma

,essay

show examples

I will discuss the issue and explain my opinion.

Firstly

while

it is true that

people

have a free choice over their wants, I tend to concede with

this

statement. Some claim that if a certain person accepts the risks of engaging in an activity that can

cause

damage,

then

it's their own choice to make

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

since they are willing to pay the price for

hospitalzation

Correct your spelling

hospitalisation

of having a

sugery

Correct your spelling

surgery

Nevertheless

, Athletes wasting hospital resources

such

as time, energy and capacity is not fair.

For example

, a sick kid who needs

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

urgent surgery is not prioritized since there is an injured climber who needs

Remove the article

apply

show examples

immediate surgery.

Consequantely

Correct your spelling

Consequently

This

action can lead to

over crowded

Correct your spelling

overcrowded

show examples

hospitals and

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

of human and medical resources.

Moreover

, Having injured

athlethes

Correct your spelling

athletes

in society could

cause

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

damage

Change preposition

show examples

local

Add an article

the local

show examples

economy. In order to create a developed, successful country, the government should make sure that each person is not risking themselves and causing unnecessary injuries. Having

people

hurt themselves through dangerous

sports

will

cause

people

miss

Add the particle

to miss

show examples

work days and have

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

of work power, which directly harms the

countrys’

Change noun form

country’s

show examples

economy. In conclusion,

Although

I think that engaging in

sports

is a great activity, I believe that the government should ban risky

sports

in order to save medical resources and prevent a downfall in the local economy.

Submitted by mayab2001 on Mon May 22 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

298 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5.5
band
The increasing housing problem in big cities has social consequences. Some people say that only governments can solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Owing to the rise in population and the polarization of people towards urban cities, there was a scarcity of houses in metropolises. To encounter this issue, some shortsighted people raised the argument that only the government can solve this problem.I'm of the opinion that people at an individual level and the government should work together to resolve this issue.
5.5
band
You are a student living in university accommodation. The heating has not worked for some time. Write a letter to the management. In your letter Explain why you complain; Describe the problems Tell what you want them to do
I am writing this letter to bring to your notice that heating system is not working properly in my room in university hostel.
4
band
The best way to solve the traffic and transportation problem is to encourage people to live in cities rather than suburbs or countryside. What are the effects of rapid population growth in the city? How can the quality of life city dwellers be maintain?
The main problem that most of the big cities faced is congested, then solution to solved this is advice the citizens live on suburbs or rural area. In this essay, i will examine the effects that contribute towards population explosion in the city if this method applied and propose some recommendation to keep the life quality of the resident.
7
band
More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?
Animal extinction is becoming a major concern all over the world because it can damage biodiversity which in terms can cause a lot of unchangeable problems. Some of the animals are already extinct while some are on the verge of being extinct. This essay will discuss the reasons behind the extinction as well as possible solutions to it.
5.5
band
You are planning to go and study English at a school overseas.You would like some information about their courses.Write a letter to the school.In your letter Ask about the school Say what kind of accommodation you want Mention any special requests you have
I'm writing to ask for information about an English university.

Some people believe that governments should ban dangerous sports even though others claim they should have the freedom to choose a sport to their liking. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give specific reasons and examples to support your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The increasing housing problem in big cities has social consequences. Some people say that only governments can solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

You are a student living in university accommodation. The heating has not worked for some time. Write a letter to the management. In your letter Explain why you complain; Describe the problems Tell what you want them to do

The best way to solve the traffic and transportation problem is to encourage people to live in cities rather than suburbs or countryside. What are the effects of rapid population growth in the city? How can the quality of life city dwellers be maintain?

More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

You are planning to go and study English at a school overseas.You would like some information about their courses.Write a letter to the school.In your letter Ask about the school Say what kind of accommodation you want Mention any special requests you have