Some people spend most of their lives living close to where they were born. What might be the reasons for this? What are the advantages and disadvantages?
In
this
contemporary era, an overwhelming majority of people spend a large portion of their entire life
close to their birthplace. Fix the agreement mistake
lives
This
essay will discuss the main factors behind such
attitude along with
the pros and cons associated extensively in the subsequent paragraphs.
To commence, the preponderant reasons are family attachment and the availability of required amenities. To expound the
first reason, Verb problem
The
many
individuals are highly attached to their parents and families, and it is very difficult for them to leave them behind and migrate, Add a missing verb
is many
consequently
, they stay in the same place for their whole life
. Moving ahead to another pivotal aspect, the main reason behind migration is availing better educational and employment opportunities, and when these are readily available in one’s own city, Fix the agreement mistake
lives
then
individuals don’t feel the need to move to some other city. For instance
, a great proportion of people residing in Delhi and nearby cities don’t move outside as they are able to get the best at their own place of stay. Hence
, the above-mentioned reasons substantiate the root causes of living in the area of birth.
Moving further
, the key merits of staying close to birthplace are better ‘family bond’ and ‘business opportunities', however
, the demerits are lesser ‘job opportunities’ and ‘Individual growth’. To explicate, spending time with family enables developing strong bonds, additionally
, any business started at the place of birth has better growth chances because most of the prospects are relatives and individuals in relationships. On the other hand
, staying in the same area not only lessen
career growth chances but Correct subject-verb agreement
lessens
also
hinders overall
personality development. For example
, numerous jobs like cybersecurity-related jobs are limited to a few big cities, and as a result
of that, many talented folks are unable to get these. Thus
, it is apparent from the above-mentioned pros and cons that why
moving is significant for a person.
Rephrase
apply
To conclude
, the primary causes for not moving are attachment to family and fulfilment of required needs. Although
the merits of this
trend are stronger bonds and business establishment which are very firm, the demerits of loss of opportunities and personality development cannot be overlooked either. In my perspective, shifting to different places holds much more in it, in addition
to that, it is very beneficial for an individual to be a better version of himself.Submitted by manpreet.kaur.riar67 on
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task response
Provide a more structured approach to the essay with clear and organized paragraph development. Work on improving the clarity and depth of ideas presented in the essay to meet the requirements of the task.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay demonstrates a clearer progression of ideas and uses appropriate linking words to connect the paragraphs. Work on developing a more cohesive and coherent structure in the essay.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.
