IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people feel that manufacturers and supermarkets have the responsibility to reduce the amount of packaging of goods. Others argue that customers should avoid buying goods with a lot of packaging. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people state that
supply
Correct article usage
the supply
show examples
side
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
manufactures
Correct your spelling
manufacturers
show examples
 and supermarkets must be responsible for eliminating the packaging of products,
while
Linking Words
 others insist that
demand
Correct article usage
the demand
show examples
side
Use synonyms
 should choose
goods
Use synonyms
 with less packaging. In my opinion, both views are vital for reducing the amount of waste on the earth, suppliers
also
Linking Words
 should have the responsibility to change consumers’
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
show examples
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, as the resource of the planet
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 limited, suppliers must reconsider their operation every single part of the supply chain to maintain the sustainability of their business and avoid
bad
Add an article
a bad
show examples
 reputation.
First,
Linking Words
people today cannot live without Amazon, which uses a huge amount of plastic
package
Replace the word
packaging
show examples
 and cardboard in its delivery operation.
However
Linking Words
, if the resources were depleted and packaging became unusable, they would not provide their main service and strength, quick delivery.
In addition
Linking Words
, Amazon’s delivery of
goods
Use synonyms
 in packaging larger than
Use synonyms
goods
Correct article usage
the goods
show examples
 themselves is often criticized by not only consumers but
also
Linking Words
 suppliers, contractors and investors in modern society in which companies are required to circulate resources
as well as
Linking Words
 possible.
Thus
Linking Words
,
such
Linking Words
operation
Correct article usage
an operation
show examples
 can damage a company’s reputation of the company, followed by the loss of
company’s
Correct article usage
the company’s
show examples
 reliability or
customers
Use synonyms
.
Second,
Linking Words
it is
also
Linking Words
 integral that
customers
Use synonyms
 must have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
responsibility
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 their consuming
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
 to pick more environmentally friendly
goods
Use synonyms
 since packaging waste is generated from almost all products, including food, beverage and health care, etc. But it is partly induced by
Correct article usage
the supply
show examples
supply
Add a hyphen
supply-side
show examples
side
Use synonyms
 offering ecological items and making
customers
Use synonyms
 aware of the importance of reducing packaging.
For instance
Linking Words
, one of the UK cosmetic brands LUSH delivers its
goods
Use synonyms
 without any plastic package to buyers, which had an occasion for existing
customers
Use synonyms
 to find out eco-consuming
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 brand was
also
Linking Words
 able to obtain new
customers
Use synonyms
 who are keenly interested in environmental protection.
Therefore
Linking Words
, changing
attitude
Correct article usage
the attitude
show examples
 of
demand
Correct article usage
the demand
show examples
side
Use synonyms
 can
also
Linking Words
 be a new opportunity. In conclusion, efforts to reduce the amount of packaging are required
to
Change preposition
by
show examples
 both
supplier
Fix the agreement mistake
suppliers
show examples
 and consumers, but the responsibility for triggering
such
Linking Words
 efforts lies with
supply
Correct article usage
the supply
show examples
side
Use synonyms
 more than
Use synonyms
customers
Correct article usage
the customers
show examples
.

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Sustainability
  • Eco-friendly
  • Carbon footprint
  • Excessive packaging
  • Biodegradable materials
  • Corporate social responsibility
  • Consumer advocacy
  • Environmental stewardship
  • Waste reduction
  • Recycling initiatives
  • Green practices
  • Minimalist lifestyle
  • Resource conservation
  • Sustainable consumption
  • Packaging alternatives
  • Regulatory measures
  • Ethical choices
  • Environmental impact assessment
  • Renewable resources
  • Compostable packaging
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