Some people think that job satisfaction is more important than job security. Others think that people cannot expect to enjoy a job and that having a permanent job is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #job #satisfaction #security

Which one is more important,

job

satisfaction

job

security

This

is a question everyone should consider before looking for any

job

. Mostly, people have contrasting views on

this

While

some agree that

job

satisfaction

is important, others prioritize employment

security

. In

this

essay, both views will be discussed and

also

, why I believe that

job

satisfaction

is more important.

Firstly

, let us look at the benefits of employment

security

. Having permanent jobs gives us peace of mind about having at least stability.

This

increases the risk-taking potential of an employee.

Moreover

this

also

makes the employer and employee trust each other more. Now let us look at the other option, the

job

satisfaction

. I entirely agree with

this

. People who are happy at

work

are more likely to give better results than others.

For example

, my father used to have a permanent

job

. But the willingness to

work

was not there because he was not happy. People used to take their

job

for granted and will not put their 100 per cent. So, he left that

job

and now works at a private firm.

Although

now the

work

is tough, the

satisfaction

from the

job

makes it worth it. In conclusion, a person should always consider whether he should expect

satisfaction

security

in his

work

While

job

security

gives you stability in life,

satisfaction

may be a better option if you want to be happy. In my opinion, I believe that happiness is more important, so getting

satisfaction

from your workplace outweighs

job

security

Submitted by Dhruv Dodia on Tue May 30 2023

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task achievement

Incorporate more specific and varied examples to strengthen the argument for job satisfaction. Using more detailed and varied evidence can help solidify the essay's points.

coherence cohesion

Ensure smooth transitions between ideas to improve the logical flow. Using linking words and phrases can help make the essay more cohesive and easier to follow.

task achievement

Broaden the discussion slightly on job security to provide a more balanced view. Discuss more aspects such as economic stability, health benefits, and family welfare to enrich the argument.

coherence cohesion

Clearly stated introduction and conclusion which help the reader understand the main points and final stance.

task achievement

The essay provides a clear and reasoned opinion, and each paragraph supports this opinion with logical points.

task achievement

Good use of personal experience to illustrate the point about job satisfaction. This makes the argument relatable and engaging.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

256 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that job satisfaction is more important than job security. Others think that people cannot expect to enjoy a job and that having a permanent job is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that planting trees in open space cities and towns is more important than building houses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Student should pay the full cost for their own study, because university education benefits students individuals rather than society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that men and women are equal and so women should be able to do anything. Others believe that men and women are not equal and therefore are certain jobs which are not suitable for women. What is your opinion?

In some countries, students live at home with a family while they study at university, whereas in other countries students attend university in another city. Do the advantages of living away from home during university outweigh the disadvantages?