In many countries, senior positions have higher salaries compared to those of young workers of the same company. Do you agree or disagree?

#countries #positions #salaries #workers #company

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Corporations in several states give higher

salaries

to their elder

workers

than junior employers. I disagree with

this

issue, and

this

essay will discuss it

further

To begin

with, there are two reasons why companies pay junior

staff

with lower

salaries

than senior

staff

Firstly

, Seniors have served the

company

longer than

juniors

and

this

service is generally depreciated by increasing wages. A case in point,

Correct your spelling

show examples

company

once a year conduct employee recruitment and increase the

salary

of older

workers

Therefore

, senior’s

salaries

are higher than young

staff

Secondly

, seniors who have been working for a long time in the

company

, their abilities are increasing.

As a result

, their skills will be appreciated by additional

salary

In addition

, there are two advantages to the gap in

salary

among

workers

. First of all, boost the enthusiasm of the

juniors

to work harder. To illustrate,

staff

who know their seniors pay more

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

will give better performance to the

company

to get a high

salary

like the senior. Second of all, loyalty from young

workers

will increase.

For example

, when an employee knows the senior's fees he or she will give

Correct quantifier usage

more to

show examples

the

company

more, one of them is loyalty.

Hence

, corporations will get

alot

Correct your spelling

a lot

of benefits from their employers.

To conclude

, I disagree that companies should justify

workers

Change noun form

workers'

worker's

show examples

salaries

Due to

the longer work experience of senior employees, they have better skills than the

juniors

and senior

workers

contribute to the

company

profits.

Furthermore

, regarding the higher

salary

of senior

workers

, there are two benefits, boosting

juniors

' spirit and loyalty.

Submitted by misstiasclassroom on Tue May 30 2023

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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In many countries, senior positions have higher salaries compared to those of young workers of the same company. Do you agree or disagree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

More and more people tend to watch foreign movies, so the local government should encourage the development of local film industry. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Buying things on the internet such as book, air ticket and groceries is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages.

Some people say that companies should allow their employees to dress casually. Do you agree or disagree with this?