The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason for growth in overweight people in society? How can this problem be solved?

#people #risk #health #reason #growth #society

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It is certainly true that today obesity has become

epidemic

Correct article usage

an epidemic

show examples

in many countries worldwide and many

people

Use synonyms

struggle with it. In

this

Linking Words

essay, I will discuss the reasons behind increase the

overweight

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in overweight

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among individuals,

as well as

Linking Words

I will

recommended

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recommend

be recommended

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some measures to mitigate

this

Linking Words

problem. In terms of causes of obesity,

Firstly

Linking Words

people

Use synonyms

Change preposition

apply

show examples

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

days rely on fast

food

Use synonyms

instead

Linking Words

prepare

Change the verb form

preparing

show examples

their meals

Change preposition

show examples

homes

Fix the agreement mistake

home

show examples

This

Linking Words

because

Add a missing verb

is because

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junk

food

Use synonyms

contains too much sugar and salt and

lack

Correct subject-verb agreement

lacks

show examples

Change preposition

apply

show examples

essential

nutirtional

Correct your spelling

nutritional

elements for

healthy

Add an article

a healthy

show examples

diet, which

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

contributes to

gain

Wrong verb form

gaining

show examples

weight for

people

Use synonyms

Furthermore

Linking Words

, junk

food

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is inexpensive and tasty , which

make

Correct subject-verb agreement

makes

show examples

better

Add an article

a better

the better

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choice for

people

Use synonyms

, because they do not have enough time to make their own

food

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Secondly

Linking Words

, individuals

adpot

Correct your spelling

adopt

adapt

sedentary

Correct article usage

a sedentary

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lifestyle. To

illusrate

Correct your spelling

illustrate

people

Use synonyms

do not receive sufficient exercise.

For example

Linking Words

, most

people

Use synonyms

nowadays, spend a considerable of time in front of technology

such

Linking Words

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

computer

Fix the agreement mistake

computers

show examples

smartphones

Correct word choice

and smartphones

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without any movement. Regarding solutions, First and

formeost

Correct your spelling

foremost

government

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the government

show examples

should introduce harsh laws in order to force

restruants

Correct your spelling

restaurants

to make

make

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

healthy

food

Use synonyms

rich

Change preposition

show examples

minerals and vitamins with less fat and salt.

Second

Add an article

The second

A second

show examples

measure, lawmakers should launch educational campaigns in order to

rasie

Correct your spelling

raise

awareness among individuals about

negative

Correct article usage

the negative

show examples

impacts of eating junk

food

Use synonyms

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

and

also

Linking Words

engcourage

Correct your spelling

encourage

people

Use synonyms

to do regular exercise. In conclusion, it seems to me that the major

reasons

Fix the agreement mistake

reason

show examples

Change preposition

for

show examples

increase

Correct article usage

the increase

show examples

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

rate of obesity among

community

Add an article

the community

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unhealthy

Add an article

an unhealthy

show examples

and inactive lifestyle, and I suggested some steps can taken by authorities to reduce

this

Linking Words

issue including,

introduce

Wrong verb form

introducing

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

strict laws and

incentivize

Wrong verb form

incentivising

show examples

people

Use synonyms

to do workout and eat

healthy

Add an article

a healthy

show examples

diet.

Submitted by faiz3177 on Tue May 30 2023

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
43
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

267 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

obesity
sedentary
caloric intake
genetics
nutritional awareness
processed foods
fast food
lifestyle diseases
preventative measures
tax incentives
urban planning
community gardens
wellness initiatives
dietary guidelines
physical fitness
calorie-dense
portion control
metabolic rate
health literacy
food deserts
work-life balance
junk food
BMI (Body Mass Index)
non-communicable diseases
food labeling

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The number of people who are at risk of serious health problems due to being overweight is increasing. What is the reason for growth in overweight people in society? How can this problem be solved?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think governments should spend as much money as possible exploring outer space. Others argue they should spend the money for poor people. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

People now days send text massages more frequently than they talk the phone. What are the reasons for this trend ? Do the advantages of texting out weigh the disadvantages ?

Women and men are commonly seen as having different strengths and weaknesses. Is it right to exclude males or females from certaion professions because of their gender? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

What precautions can people take to reduce the spread of food-borne illnesses?

The plans below show the site of an airport now and how it will look after redevelopment next year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.