IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people argue that sending criminals to prison is the best method of dealing with them. However, others believe that education and job training are better way to help them. Discuss both views and give your opinion

#people #criminals #prison #method #education #job
No doubt ,the
crime
 rate is significantly increasing these days
however
 some individuals often argue that prison punishment is the best way to overcome it
whereas
 opponents claim that studying and working is the only way to reduce it . In
this
 ,essay I shall briefly explain both viewpoints and I stand with the latter opinions. On the one side ,
crime
 should send to prison rather than other punishment because it creates fear in the public mind and thieves think twice before doing a
crime
.Needless to say , when lawbreakers live without their family and friends
then
 they learn how to survive in
this
 world after leaving their comfort zone .
This
 is because ,in jail , people cannot meet and call their loved ones when they need and feel to talk with them . As there is one particular time period that they have to spend in prison with two-time meals and they complete and do everything by themselves without any help .
Therefore
 , it is not a bad method to feel their mistakes.
On the other hand
 , giving good information and work is
also
 not a bad idea to change a person through. In fact , if the best education is available for all castes and classes
then
 evil will automatically decrease in any nation as the reason behind
crime
 is low discipline and they sit free in their life so they did the
crime
 to fulfil basic requirements like two-time meals and a normal home with their family .
Nonetheless
 , if they give normal jobs and study
then
 they can definitely do work
instead
 of
crime
 .
Thus
 , the quality of academics easily changes the mass's life without any warming which is why is
also
 one way to remove
crime
 from the country . In conclusion,
although
 prior is the major solution to control the
crime
 rate in any part of the world ,
nevertheless
 I believe that if good education is available from childhood
then
 it will
crime
 cannot be developed.
Submitted by kirandkaur131 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Incarceration
  • Deterrent
  • Rehabilitation
  • Recidivism
  • Job training
  • Vocational programs
  • Cost-effectiveness
  • Criminal justice system
  • Reintegration
  • Correctional facilities
  • Restorative justice
  • Social reformation
  • Penal institution
  • Public safety
  • Community service
  • Criminal behavior
  • Reoffending
  • Support networks
  • Life skills
  • Carceral state
What to do next:
Look at other essays: