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Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

1. The chart below shows the percentage of adults of different age groups in the UK who used the Internet everyday from 2003-2006. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

1. The chart below shows the percentage of adults of different age groups in the UK who used the Internet everyday from 2003-2006. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#percentage #adults #age #groups #uk #internet #information #features #comparisons
The chart illustrates the
percentage
 of
adultswith
Correct your spelling
adults with
 different
age
 groups using the
internet
Correct your spelling
Internet
show examples
 between
2003
Correct article usage
the 2003
show examples
 and 2006 time period in Great Britain.
Overall
, the highest
percentage
 of
internet
 usage
waslshown
Correct your spelling
was shown
 by
tje
Correct your spelling
the
 youngest
age
 group between 16-24 years. Apart from that, over 65 aged people had the least interest in using
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 showing least number of
percentage
. The main users of
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 were
ypung
Correct your spelling
young
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
between
Correct article usage
the 16-24age
show examples
16-24age
Correct your spelling
16-24 age
 group.In 2003 and 2004 the shared same
percentage
 of 80% and rose
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the peak of 100% in 2005. But
then
 they declined nearly
into
Change preposition
to
show examples
 90% in 2006. Both
25
Correct article usage
the 25
show examples
-44 and 45-54 aged groups showed an upward trend between 2003 and 2006.
Although
final
Correct article usage
the final
show examples
 two
age
 groups showed some fluctuations,
overall
Add an article
the overall
show examples
 trend was upward. In 25-
44
Add a comma
,44
show examples
 there was a gradual growth from 50% in 2003 and 80% in 2006.
Age
 45-54
age
 group showed
same
Correct article usage
the same
show examples
 gradual growth from 60% to 80% between 2003 and 2006.
Submitted by janithkalana84 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage, age, internet with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "growth" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradual" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage
  • adults
  • age groups
  • Internet
  • daily users
  • increase
  • significantly
  • highest
  • lowest
  • rise
  • contrast
  • smallest
  • followed closely by
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