Some People believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on the society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behaviour. What is your opinion.

The trend of graphics
games
and
media
is dramatically rising. Millions of individuals prefer to spend most of their time on graphical
games
. A group of traditionalists claims that these activities have an adverse effect on the community.
While
some communities think that these trends are not related to how
people
reacts
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react
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. In my opinion, these gadgets and social
media
play an essential role
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
brainwashing
people
's mindsets. Every day more than 1 billion
people
use social
media
and play pc
games
, and there are some anti-national groups on social
media
which
offers
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offer
show examples
small
Add an article
a small
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amount of money to complete a normal task. Individuals who are most active have a high retention rate, which is why they create a task in
such
a way which can psychologically affect them and make them
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their puppets to do any wrong thing.
Moreover
, there are
games
like blue whale which are banned by the Government, because more than 10 thousand
people
attempt suicide
while
playing that game.
Thus
, nowadays manipulating someone's mind is too common on these platforms.
On the other hand
, there are some individuals who are most affected by studies, bad financial stability, and bullying.
For instance
, a kid that has been bullied can sometimes be cruel to someone else. Another point to consider is the fact that younger seek help but they do not have enough support from the ruling authorities. In a nutshell, the adverse effect of social
media
has badly affected the mindset of the community, as a matter of
fact
Add the comma(s)
,fact
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people
are committing big crimes, which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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too tough to control, and psychologically affecting
games
should be banned by the Government.
Submitted by pranav10puri on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • pivotal
  • desensitize
  • catalyst
  • predisposed
  • harmless outlet
  • distinguish
  • controlled environments
  • empirical research
  • minimal or no direct correlation
  • socio-economic status
  • predisposition
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