The bar chart below shows the number of employed persons by job type and sex for Australia last year Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart below shows the number of employed persons by job type and sex for Australia last year

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
The chart illustrates how many
men
and women were hired for a current type of job in the country of Australia for the past year. Units are measured in percentages.
Overall
, the bigger part of hired people for all kinds of jobs were
men
. Women,
on the other hand
, were not the preferred choice for most of the types of employers, but there were two sections that were more than the male portion of the research. Types like clerical and trades were very successful for
men
(approximately 900) and just behind them were manager positions and professional sectors (around 600). Women,
on the other hand
, didn't get as much work as
men
. Hitting their lower point in trades and production (100), their percentages are significantly under those of the opposite gender. The clerical sort of occupation is the most fortunate for females (almost 1000), leading with some percentages from pro work.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "on the other hand".
Vocabulary: Replace the words men with synonyms.
Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 3 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Employment figures
  • Sectors
  • Significant disparities
  • Gender balance
  • Skewed
  • Trends
  • Patterns
  • Dominant
  • Inferred
  • Labor market
  • Year-on-year comparison
  • Insights
  • Implications
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