IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

The tendency of human beings to copy one another is shown in the popularity of fashion in clothes and consumer goods. Do you agree or disagree?

#tendency #beings #copy #popularity #fashion #clothes #consumer #goods
These days, there is a popularity of fashion in clothes and consumer products. Some people assume that
this
 popularity is caused by a copy of humans. My notion is that fashion in clothes and consuming commodities is popularly demonstrated, which does not only depend on the intentional similarity of humans but
also
 on cultural identity and self-expression. On the one hand, the fashionable following of clothing and consuming commodities is mainly promoted by cultural identity, self-expression, and the demands of customers.
For instance
, the fashionable acceptance
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 cultural identity is shown through the traditional costume of Vietnamese high-school students,
On the other hand
, a convergence of
trend
Fix the agreement mistake
trends
show examples
 in clothing and consumer merchandise can cause plenty of positive and negative impacts.
While
 copying can motivate
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cultural homogenization and decrease cultural diversity, it
also
 can create a cultural exchange and more innovative developments among different countries.
In particular
, globalization helps the fast food industry in the United States namely McDonald’s corporation spread across the world, which creates a reduction in cuisine diversity between distinct countries and a food differentiation in a country. In conclusion, the convergence of fashion in clothing and consuming products
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 popularly exposed, but it is not only because of the intention of humans but
also
 of the culture and lifestyle of people in different areas.
Submitted by dothaovy0804 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: