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Writing Samples
Band 5

The tables below give information about sales of Fairtrade*-labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The tables below give information about sales of Fairtrade*-labelled coffee and bananas in 1999 and 2004 in five European countries. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The tables demonstrate how much Fairtrade coffee and bananas were sold in 1999 and 2004.
Overall
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
Switzerland
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 was in both years on top of the list except for the coffee purchase in 2004 that British people surpassed them. The
sale
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 of coffee in the UK under the label of Fairtrade had seen a dramatic rise by 2004, from 1.5 to 20
million
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 euros.
Switzerland
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 which used to be the top seller, in the
last
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.
year
Add the comma(s)
,year

It appears that you are missing a comma or two with the interrupter in the last year. Consider adding the comma(s).

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 stood at the second rand,
although
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 the Swiss had doubled their corresponding purchase after five years. The other European countries under the study - Denmark, Belgium, and Sweden - accounted for trivial numbers in
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

sale
Fix the agreement mistake
sales

It seems that sale may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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 compared to the first two countries mentioned above. Faritrade-labelled bananas were the most popular in
Switzerland
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 in the
last
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 year of the 20th century with 15
million
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 euros
Use synonyms
Change preposition
in sale
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Use synonyms
Change preposition
in sale

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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sale
Fix the agreement mistake
sales
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. The other countries did not have more than 5
million
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 euros in the market
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

. After half a decade,
Switzerland
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 was still standing on top, selling 47
million
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

 which was even almost three times its own
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
sale
Fix the agreement mistake
sales

It seems that sale may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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 in 1999. One prominent feature of the report is that the UK and Belgium had increased more than 5 times each, (1-5.5) and (0.6-4) respectively. Sweden and Denmark represented the only declines throughout the data in both tables, (1.8-1) and (2-0.9) in order.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words switzerland, sale, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "tables" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fairtrade-labelled
  • sales figures
  • percentage increase/decrease
  • European countries
  • sales volume
  • notable trend
  • exponential growth
  • moderate rise
  • marked decline
  • comparative analysis
  • economic factors
  • consumer preferences
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