IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 3

The plans below show the layout of a university’s sports centre now, and how it will look after redevelopment. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and comparisons where relevant.

#plans #show #layout #university’s #sports #centre #redevelopment #summaries #information #features #comparisons
he
Correct your spelling
The
show examples
two
 provided maps illustrate the current situation of the university
centre
 and
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
its proposed extension for future development.
Overall
,
while
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the principal change will be the removal of outdoor courts
besides
Change preposition
beside
show examples
 the
pool
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 and a leisure
pool
 will be added
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the eastern part of
centre
Add an article
the centre
show examples
, which will attract more students to use the
sports
centre
. It is
also
 noticeable that more
facilities
 will be constructed despite some core
facilities
,
such
 as reception,
25
Correct word choice
and 25
show examples
cm
pool
 will be preserved. The most fundamental
facilities
 like changing room, a 25m
pool
 and reception will be in the same as always,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
at the
centre
 of the place. Before going in them, the entrance will be enlarged in double, and a
Sports
 shop and Café will be added, one will be at the left and another one will be at the right corner
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 the entrance area. To serve more students for the new
sports
facilities
,
two
 changing rooms will be added along the
two
 sides of
entrance
Add an article
the entrance
show examples
.
Moreover
, the outdoor courts on the eastern and western part of
centre
Add an article
the centre
show examples
 will be demolished to make way for the construction of a leisure
pool
,
sports
 hall and
two
 dancing studios. Meanwhile, there is a gym room to the north of the 25 cm swimming
pool
, which will be remarkably extended to be doubled so that more students can use it.
Submitted by sharon021082 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: