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Writing Samples
Band 8

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organized group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #parents #children #part #group #activities #time
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Nowadays parents are less likely to put
pressure
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 on their children to excel only in
academics
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,Meanwhile, they are encouraging their
kids
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 to participate in extra-curricular
activities
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 in their free time,
However
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, it can be argued that a child should not be forced to do these
instead
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 they need to teach how to occupy themselves on their own. In my opinion, it is parents’ responsibility to find the talent of their
kids
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 and encourage them to excel in those apart from
academics
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.
Firstly
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, as far as I am concerned current generation
kids
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 have more opportunities to excel in other
activities
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 outside of their books. During my childhood, there was a belief that only outperforming in
academics
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 will make a good future. Millennial parents are motivating their
kids
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 to indulge in learning
activities
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 which will help in boosting self-confidence and
overall
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 personal development.
For example
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, A few years back there has been a scholarship introduced in India known as “sports quota”
that is
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 for students who have merited in sports, even though they have a minimum pass percentile in
academics
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 they are eligible for a part of their fees as scholarship bourne by the government for continuing their university studies. Unequivocally, Indulging
kids
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 in these
activities
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 help them to think creatively, but
also
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this
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 should not turn in any
pressure
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 on them.
Instead
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 of insisting them to learn sports that we ,like we might help them to find their own talent and guide them on how to excel in that in their own way. We cannot
pressure
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 them to learn a particular activity only because that would be giving them monetary benefits. It is important for parents to choose the activity they wish to learn and be supportive of them for excelling in the same.
For instance
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, making a kid learn football in his free time
while
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 he is having his interest towards drawing is peer
pressure
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 for him,
therefore
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 he would not be able to achieve the same.
To conclude
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, I believe it is important to encourage a kid on learning organized
activities
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similarly
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 that should be the ones he is interested in learning ,
instead
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 of the ones we need him to learn,
as a result
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, the children will learn new
activities
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, improving their confidence level, Socializing with people.
Submitted by vyshu.bakkiam on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • encourage
  • occupied
  • organized
  • group activities
  • benefits
  • social
  • teamwork skills
  • interpersonal skills
  • friendship
  • discipline
  • time management
  • interests
  • hobbies
  • independent play
  • creativity
  • problem-solving skills
  • self-reliance
  • explore
  • discover
What to do next:
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