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Nowadays, families are not as close as in the past and a lot of people have become used to this. Why is this happening? Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the drawbacks? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.

Nowadays, families are not as close as in the past and a lot of people have become used to this. Why is this happening? Do the advantages of this trend outweigh the drawbacks? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own experience or knowledge.
#families #people #trend
These days, many families do not have close relationships as in the past and numerous
people
 have adopted
this
 change. The main reason for
this
trend
 is that individuals are moving to have a better
life
. I believe that the demerit of
this
trend
 far outweighs any supposed merits. The primary reason for
this
trend
 is that numerous
people
 opt to move to other places to find better work opportunities to improve their living standards.
This
 is because they want to upgrade the way they live their
life
. To achieve
this
, they leave their hometown and with the passage of time, they lose connections with loved ones and soon get used to it.
For example
, my friend who went to Mumbai for work is not connected with relatives and his all loved ones complain about his behaviour. The main advantage of living away from the family is that there is no interference from family members in how they live their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
This
 makes them more independent to decide on their own.
However
, when
people
 live away from their family, they are not able to get guidance from experienced
people
 in difficult situations,
Therefore
, it is more likely that they
take
Correct your spelling
make
show examples
 wrong decisions which can ruin their
life
. In conclusion,
people
 are moving away from their loved ones
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
because they
start
Wrong verb form
started
show examples
 working in other cities and I believe that
this
trend
 has more drawbacks as
people
 are not surrounded by experienced family members over its merit of no interference of elderly
people
.
Submitted by iftenevlad on

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task response
For task response, the essay provides a clear response to the questions posed and includes both the reasons for the trend and the weighing of advantages and drawbacks. However, there is room to improve the development of ideas and address all aspects of the topic.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, the essay demonstrates a clear overall structure with an introduction, body, and conclusion. However, the logical progression of ideas within paragraphs could be strengthened by providing more developed and connected examples and explanations.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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