There is a lot of pressure on young people today to succeed academically. As a result, some people believe that non-academic subjects, such as physical education and cookery, should be removed from the school syllabus so that children can concentrate on academic work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#pressure #people #subjects #education #cookery #school #syllabus #children #work

The pressure to succeed academically is a growing concern for young people. Some individuals argue that non-academic

subjects

such

as physical education and cookery, should be removed from the

school

syllabus

so that children can focus on academic work. In

this

essay, I will discuss both views and provide my own perspective on the issue. On the one hand, some individuals argue that non-academic

subjects

should be removed from the

school

syllabus

to allow

students

to concentrate on academic work. They argue that

this

will help

students

achieve better grades and increase their chances

Moreover

, they argue that in today's competitive job market, academic qualifications are more important than ever before, and

students

need to focus on academic

subjects

in order to succeed.

On the other hand

, there are several reasons why non-academic

subjects

should be included in the

school

syllabus

Firstly

, physical education is important for maintaining a healthy lifestyle and keeping

students

physically active.

Secondly

subjects

such

as cookery can teach important life skills and encourage healthy eating habits.

Additionally

, non-academic

subjects

can provide a break from the academic workload and help to reduce stress levels among

students

Finally

, non-academic

subjects

can provide opportunities for creativity and self-expression, which can be important for

overall

well-being and personal development. In conclusion,

while

academic success is important, non-academic

subjects

such

as physical education and cookery should not be removed from the

school

syllabus

. These

subjects

provide important life skills. and It can help to develop their habits

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

247 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

pressure
succeed
academically
non-academic
physical education
cookery
school syllabus
concentrate
academic work
well-rounded
enhancement
practical skills
balanced education system

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Fully explain your ideas

Some people say modern children's games do not develop a wide range of skills, while traditional games can be much better for developing such skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people get into debt by buying things they don't need and can't afford. What are the reasons for this behavior? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?

People living in the 21st century have better quality of life than the previous centuries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people are using credit cards or loans to run up huge personal debts that they may be unable to repay. It should therefore be made more difficult for the individuals to borrow large amounts of money. What are your opinions on this?