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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In Britian, when someone gets old they often go to live in a home with other old people where there are nurses to look after them. Sometimes the government has to pay for this care. who do you think should pay for this care? the government or families?

#britian #someone #home #people #nurses #government #care #families
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People
Use synonyms
 attend to live in nursing homes when they get old in the UK.
Hence
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, the
government
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 supports these places in order to take
care
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 of old
people
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. There are two opposite camps regarding
this
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 issue. A majority of individuals mention the idea that it is the
government
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's duty to allocate a budget
in
Change preposition
for
show examples
 nursing homes,
while
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 others opine that families should pay for
this
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care
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. I personally agree with the first group.
Firstly
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,
although
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 the expenditure of these places can be exorbitant, old
people
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 need the
government
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's support. Some of them have worked and served their whole lifetime to help the country. Because of
this
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, authorities ought to consider their conditions in old age.
Moreover
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, it is an encouragement for
people
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 who are younger. Because they will release the fact that when they get older the
government
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 will give them support and help in the future.
Secondly
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, some of the old ones come from underprivileged families.
Hence
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, they can not afford the expenses of these nursing homes. The more the
government
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 provides a budget to take
care
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 of them, the more life expectancy will improve in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society. Because they will have a supporter on behalf of the authorities.
To sum up
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, all the aforementioned points bring us to the conclusion that,
this
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care
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 from the
government
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 can be beneficial for both the society and the old-aged community. Because the individuals will be pleased about
this
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 facility and they will serve the country more and better,
also
Linking Words
 old ones can enjoy their retirement,
although
Linking Words
 it can be expensive for the
government
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.
Submitted by parianabiloo78 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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