In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extent do you think this is a positive trend?

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Nowadays, more and more people from all social categories start to enjoy shopping and to consider it a relaxing activity . I strongly agree that regarding it as a hobby is a positive trend. I am going to explain the reasons in the following paragraphs.

Firstly

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, shopping can improve people's mental health. When individuals are sad and they don't feel like going outside , just thinking about their favourite store can boost their serotonin level, which is the hormone for happiness.

Furthermore

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, looking at a new collection from a famous clothes shop , which was thought to attract individuals' attention, and imagining themselves wearing them increases their confidence by more than 50 per cent.

For example

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, a little girl

that

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

had a bad day at school can instantly shift her mood if her mother takes her to the mall and

buy

Correct subject-verb agreement

buys

show examples

her a new dress.

Moreover

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, the hobby of buying stuff may improve young's relationships with their family. Some fathers take their sons to the toy store in order to grow a stronger connection, without their child realising it. So, for some children, the action of buying has become a passion that motivates them to learn better.

For instance

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, if his parents promise to take their kid to the Toycars store if he gets a good grade, he will study 10 times more for that exam.

In other words

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, shopping has become a rewarding action for some human beings. In conclusion, I think that shopping is a beneficial activity for individuals, boosting happiness, increasing their confidence ,

as well as

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building up strong family connexions.

Submitted by zaineajessica on Thu Jul 06 2023

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task response

The essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the task, but the response is not fully developed and lacks depth. Ensure to explore the topic in more depth and consider both sides of the argument.

coherence cohesion

The essay lacks a coherent structure and the introduction and conclusion are not fully developed. Ensure to organize your ideas logically with clear introductions and conclusions.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

267 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

consumerism
retail therapy
materialism
disposable income
economic growth
financial instability
environmental impact
social interaction
community building
emotional satisfaction
advertising influence
shopping habits

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In the past, shopping was a routine domestic task. Many people nowadays regard it as a hobby. To what extent do you think this is a positive trend?

Include an introduction and conclusion

You have unexpectedly come into a large sum of money and you want to share this good news with your friend. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter explain where the money came from say what you intend to do with the money invite your friend to celebrate your good fortune.

International travel has many advantages to both travelers and the country visited. Do you think advantages outweigh disadvantages?

It is a good thing for people in senior management positions to get a higher salary than other workers in the same company.

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that It is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.