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Band 4.5

Nowadays both men and women spend a lot of money on beauty care. This was not in the past. What may be the root cause of this behaviour? Discuss the reasons and possible results.

#men #women #money #beauty #care #was #root #behaviour #results
As men and women both prefer to do
makeup
 and use a lot much more
beauty
care
produces
Replace the word
products
show examples
 compare to
past
Correct article usage
the past
show examples
.
This
 behaviour has two sides possible and
negitive
Correct your spelling
negative
. Not only females spent
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
 time on
makeup
 but
also
male
Fix the agreement mistake
males
show examples
 are
also
 spending. As there is nowadays,
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 trend of doing
makeover
Fix the agreement mistake
makeovers
show examples
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
results
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 much more expensive
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
beauty
. As
people
 are spending more money on
makeup
 which leads to a waste of money. It is ok if a
person
 is doing skincarecare but there should be
limit
Correct article usage
a limit
show examples
 set on it which is good for both
person
 and nature.
Male
Add an article
The male
A male
show examples
 should use healthy
products
 which
does
Change the verb form
do
show examples
 not harm the
skin
. In the past,
people
prefre
Correct your spelling
preferred
 to spend
income
Correct pronoun usage
their income
show examples
 on food items but now, there are using it for looking
beautifull
Correct your spelling
beautiful
 or handsome. As
beauty
care
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
side
Add an article
a side
the side
show examples
 on
body
Correct article usage
the body
show examples
 and
skin
, to reduce
this
 government should increase tax on it which
result
Correct subject-verb agreement
results
show examples
 in
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
good for the public.
This
 leads to harm
orignal
Correct your spelling
original
skin
 and make real
skin
 damage.
Beauty
care
 does not show the real face of the
person
.
People
 who can not
affot
Correct your spelling
afford
 high price
beauty
care
 and
their
Correct pronoun usage
whose
show examples
skin
 are dark feel low to go
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
public
Add an article
a public
the public
show examples
 place. There are some positive
side
Fix the agreement mistake
sides
show examples
 to
beauty
products
 like more
products
 should be processed
then
 companies need to procure more as they do more production more
people
 will get employment. A
person
 should set
Correct article usage
a limite
show examples
limite
Correct your spelling
limit
 for using
products
 and try to
using
Change the verb
use
show examples
 things like Alovera. A
person
 should do not fill shy to show
it
Correct pronoun usage
their
his
her
show examples
 real face or
skin
 to others. Government should take action in the fair of the public and should make a limitation on
beauty
 bands. Government should spot those
makeup
 or
beauty
products
 which are good for the
skin
.
Submitted by purvametaliya99  on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • media influence
  • idealized beauty standards
  • disposable income
  • economic prosperity
  • technological advancements
  • beauty products and services
  • cultural shifts
  • social contexts
  • personal health and wellness
  • self-care routines
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