IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

The chart below shown how frequently people in the USA ate in fast food restaurants between 2003 and 2013.

#people #usa #food #restaurants
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The given line chart demonstrates
proportion
Add an article
the proportion
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 of junk food
consumptions
Fix the agreement mistake
consumption
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 by residents in United
State
Fix the agreement mistake
States
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 during the
ten
Add a hyphen
ten-year
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year
Use synonyms
 period, from 2003 to 2013.
Overall
Linking Words
, it could be clearly seen that the citizens in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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America have visited considerably
the
Correct article usage
apply
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restaurants for buying
shorteats
Correct your spelling
short eats
shortcuts
 within
one
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
 per week and
one
Use synonyms
 or two times per month during
contemporary
Add an article
the contemporary
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 period. The data record that individuals in America consumed junk food about
a
Correct article usage
apply
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33%
one
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
 during the week in 2006 and it would be peaked level
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
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 with other categories
in
Change preposition
apply
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this
Linking Words
year
Use synonyms
. Apparently, by 2013,
one
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
 or two
Use synonyms
time
Change to a plural noun
times
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 per month about
33
Correct article usage
a 33
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% ratio of consumers have gone to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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hotels
for
Change preposition
to
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 purchase instant foods. A glance at, it was
Change preposition
at a
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a
Change the article
an
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 equal level.
According to
Linking Words
 these
stastatistics
Correct your spelling
statistics
, in the
year
Use synonyms
 2003, the buyers in
this
Linking Words
 nation
have
Unnecessary verb
apply
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spend
Replace the word
spent
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time
Use synonyms
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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cafeterias
one
Use synonyms
time
Use synonyms
 per seven days approximately around 31% proportion. It was the biggest increment
in
Change preposition
apply
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this
Linking Words
year
Use synonyms
 over the other
time
Use synonyms
 duration categories.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, daily customers in all three years was significantly
decline
Wrong verb form
declined
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. It was lower than 5%.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the figures reveal that during
this
Linking Words
 period the
fast
Correct quantifier usage
number of fast
show examples
 food lovers, who did not go to shops, was
decrease
Wrong verb form
decreased
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than
Change preposition
by
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 5%.
Submitted by yohanigallage99 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Fast food consumption
  • Frequency
  • Dining trends
  • Demographic factors
  • Peak periods
  • Downward/upward trend
  • Lifestyle choices
  • Nutritional awareness
  • Economic impact
  • Health implications
  • Convenience foods
  • Eating habits
  • Statistical evidence
  • Year-over-year comparison
  • Fluctuation
What to do next:
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