Many parents are concerned about the violent computer games or movies or leisure activities. How can this impact children? What can be done to solve this problem?

There is a common belief that
computer
games
and
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
websites on the internet may bring violence to teenagers.As far as
Iam
Correct your spelling
I am
concerned ,
this
phenomenon can result in serious problems,which can be tackled using
appropricate
Correct your spelling
appropriate
miasures
Correct your spelling
measures
. It is possible said that
this
issue may
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
lead to some harmful effects on
children
's brain development.
To begin
with,young
children
are exposed to violence from these sources, and they learn about the negativity that drives people to commit crimes like robbery and murder or even suicide via movies and video
games
.
For instance
,as a research in 2013 in America ,about 90
percent
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per cent
show examples
of students at the age of 16 who love playing violent
computer
games
are
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apply
show examples
all make incorrect decisions.
This
is because they are
felling
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feeling
show examples
excited when do something violent like violent
games
in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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real life.
Beside
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Besides
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,
this
trend can make the youths be virtual violent when using them so much.In
UK
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the UK
show examples
,
at
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in
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the era of 90s,the ratio of criminals
were
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apply
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increased highly,most of them are
at
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apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
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age
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aged
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from
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apply
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14 to 20,and be cached by
polices
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police
show examples
in
the
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apply
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situation of delusion.
However
,despite the bad effects,parents can still find solutions to
this
issue and contribute to their scion's growth. One of them is that parents must become more careful and closely
advice
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advise
show examples
what their kids watch on the television or on the
computer
. They need to educate their young
one's
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ones
show examples
and involve them in social work if they observe bad behaviour in them. It helps them to become docile and know what is right to do.
Also
, the government and regulators must ensure that these violent programs are not telecast during prime time when all family members including
children
watch television.
To sum
up
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,up
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with
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apply
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,there are amount of disadvantages
with
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to
show examples
computer
games
and it seems that parents need to exercise caution and monitor their
children
's activity since
games
can
be bring
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
bad
effect
Fix the agreement mistake
effects
show examples
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
their
childs
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
.

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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