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Writing Samples
Band 3.5

Due to the advancement of technology, more and more people are working from home. This has many benefits to workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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With the advent of science and technology, the Internet has become a necessity for life and every household.
Along with
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 many other benefits, it has provided the ease of remote working for many individuals especially those working in software sectors. Though people have different opinions on that, I am of the stance that
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 is extremely beneficial.
Firstly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it has given an opportunity to workers to work with ease from the comfortable environment of home.
Hence
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, providing them with the mental peace to concentrate more and bring out the best
of
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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 their performances.
Secondly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it saves time and money required for travelling to and from offices relieving them from other stress.the same amount and time can now be utilised by the employee to serve better the Another helpful aspect of working from home is that it helps avoid unnecessary pollution that would be part of our air if these people would go and work in their respective offices. In conclusion, it can be said with all surety that working remotely has brought a number of advantages on
individual
Add an article
an individual
the individual

The noun phrase individual seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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as well as
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.
collective
Add an article
a collective
the collective

The noun phrase collective basis seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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 basis. It is definitely a step forward for future development and endeavours and it is going to provide many financial benefits for all of us

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • advancement of technology
  • work from home
  • flexibility
  • work-life balance
  • daily commute
  • job satisfaction
  • productivity
  • cost savings
  • transportation costs
  • disposable income
  • environmental impact
  • carbon emissions
  • traffic congestion
  • sustainable
  • professional and personal responsibilities
  • rigid work schedule
  • mental and physical health
  • exposure to illnesses
  • control over work environment
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